I want to give up everything and move to the midwest and find an old divorced white trash woman in her 50s who will love me unconditionally and we could sit around all day and be nudists and collect unemployment and watch porn with her adult children who still live with her.
More Blogs
-
2
Tuesday May 03, 2011
You will never catch me with an erection while a saxophone is playing. -
1
Monday Apr 25, 2011
I wonder if Barry Manilow is blowing someone right now. -
1
Friday Feb 25, 2011
If you HAPPEN to meet someone at a comedy show you're doing and she H… -
0
Wednesday Feb 02, 2011
I'm about one more bad day away from going off the grid and drinking … -
1
Wednesday Jan 26, 2011
Going to stop using side mirrors when I drive and announce to everyon… -
2
Tuesday Dec 21, 2010
In case you were wondering, I don't have ball implants. They're the r… -
2
Wednesday Nov 24, 2010
Just went thru airport security and TSA ran a feather down my ass cra… -
0
Monday Nov 15, 2010
Whatever occupation you do, put "America's" in front of it and people… -
2
Friday Oct 22, 2010
Read More -
2
Wednesday Oct 20, 2010
Someone just gave me a pack of Skittles Fizzl'd Fruits. I don't know …