starstealer

i hate being lied to. like people think that you can't handle the truth. i hate looking like a fool. i hate feeling bad, i hate feeling at all.
today trevor called but he called the house i wasn't home. he e-mailed me and asked me what i wanted for christmas, anything no price limit. i want a car but can't ask for that although he would buy it for me, i think i will ask him for some clothes and shoes and a nice purse. if i am going to get gallery shows or try to i can't wear these tacky cheap clothes i have. i have to dress like i dressed when i was his wife. he kept all my clothes though like they were my wife uniform. it is kind of funny. i decided next time i marry i will not marry a rich kid, i should marry a rich man. Meaning I don't want to marry some son of a rich kid, but the self made rich man. I dunno that's shallow but i am beyond carring at this point. but who knows I am capable of marry for love maybe.
i finally caved and called sam. she is dating someone. she asked if i was and i just said "i dunno". then i told her i heard what jeaneece had said and i wasn't making a big deal about it i just thought that is was weird she would say something like that randomly. newho what else is going on in my life? GOD I AM SO CONFUSED!