Fuck the University of Miami.
Miami proves once again that UM really stands for Underdeveloped Mentally. And I don't mean for that big fucking fight; shit, everyone's used to Miami starting fights with people. The punishment is what pisses me off. Florida International University took immediate action against its players; two of them were kicked straight off the team and ordered 50 hours community service (which they will probably spend signing autographs), and the entire team was placed on probation for the entire academic year. What the fuck has Miami done? Absofuckinglutely nothing.
One player, ONE PLAYER, ONE PLAYER was suspended indefinitely, which will most likely be anywhere from one game to five minutes, and he was the one SWINGING HIS HELMET AT PEOPLE. The guy who was STOMPING on people hasn't gotten one fucking INCH of punishment; this after the NFL "suspended indefinitely" (there's that term again god damn it) a player for stomping on someone. That's like saying, "Hey Judas, I know you fucked Jesus over, but here, do some community service and we'll let you get into heaven; no problem."
Here now, is a list of all the synonyms for "retarded" listed on Thesaurus.com: brainless, dazed, deficient, dense, dim, dodo, doltish, dopy, dotterel, dull, dumb, dummy, foolish, futile, gullible, half-baked*, half-witted, idiotic, ill-advised, imbecilic, inane, indiscreet, insensate, irrelevant, irresponsible, laughable, loser, ludicrous, meaningless, mindless, moronic, naive, nonsensical, obtuse, pointless, puerile, rash, senseless, short-sighted, simple, simple-minded, slow, sluggish, stolid, stupefied, thick, thickheaded, trivial, unintelligent, unthinking, witless -- all of these AND MORE apply to the fucking Univershitty of Miami. UM is like the Catholic Confessional of college football institutions; God (Or in this case Donna Shalala -- what the fuck kind of name is that; I don't trust that bitch at all) doesn't give a shit as long as you walk into that booth and say you did it. "Hey Donna, I fucked a monkey with an AK47 on the sideline while singing the Cuban national anthem." "Um...community service."
THEY'VE ONLY SUSPENDED ONE PLAYER. Fuck them. What you do is you end their season, give every team who was going to play them a win in that slot, and make them all sit in a mental hospital for ONE DAY. That's all you need. By the time the day is over, Timmy over there with his helmet on will have made them feel so bad about themselves that they'll probably openly weep, then convert to Islam. Problem solved. Either that, or you make them take anger management classes from Mike Ditka. That'll go well.
Oh, and as a sidenote: Troy Polamalu, CUT YOUR FUCKING HAIR.
Miami proves once again that UM really stands for Underdeveloped Mentally. And I don't mean for that big fucking fight; shit, everyone's used to Miami starting fights with people. The punishment is what pisses me off. Florida International University took immediate action against its players; two of them were kicked straight off the team and ordered 50 hours community service (which they will probably spend signing autographs), and the entire team was placed on probation for the entire academic year. What the fuck has Miami done? Absofuckinglutely nothing.
One player, ONE PLAYER, ONE PLAYER was suspended indefinitely, which will most likely be anywhere from one game to five minutes, and he was the one SWINGING HIS HELMET AT PEOPLE. The guy who was STOMPING on people hasn't gotten one fucking INCH of punishment; this after the NFL "suspended indefinitely" (there's that term again god damn it) a player for stomping on someone. That's like saying, "Hey Judas, I know you fucked Jesus over, but here, do some community service and we'll let you get into heaven; no problem."
Here now, is a list of all the synonyms for "retarded" listed on Thesaurus.com: brainless, dazed, deficient, dense, dim, dodo, doltish, dopy, dotterel, dull, dumb, dummy, foolish, futile, gullible, half-baked*, half-witted, idiotic, ill-advised, imbecilic, inane, indiscreet, insensate, irrelevant, irresponsible, laughable, loser, ludicrous, meaningless, mindless, moronic, naive, nonsensical, obtuse, pointless, puerile, rash, senseless, short-sighted, simple, simple-minded, slow, sluggish, stolid, stupefied, thick, thickheaded, trivial, unintelligent, unthinking, witless -- all of these AND MORE apply to the fucking Univershitty of Miami. UM is like the Catholic Confessional of college football institutions; God (Or in this case Donna Shalala -- what the fuck kind of name is that; I don't trust that bitch at all) doesn't give a shit as long as you walk into that booth and say you did it. "Hey Donna, I fucked a monkey with an AK47 on the sideline while singing the Cuban national anthem." "Um...community service."
THEY'VE ONLY SUSPENDED ONE PLAYER. Fuck them. What you do is you end their season, give every team who was going to play them a win in that slot, and make them all sit in a mental hospital for ONE DAY. That's all you need. By the time the day is over, Timmy over there with his helmet on will have made them feel so bad about themselves that they'll probably openly weep, then convert to Islam. Problem solved. Either that, or you make them take anger management classes from Mike Ditka. That'll go well.
Oh, and as a sidenote: Troy Polamalu, CUT YOUR FUCKING HAIR.