I went to school today, first time in a week. I had missed it, and I thought I wasn't going to be able to go back. We had some stuff we had to deal with here, both wedding and financial. But I was so happy to be there, to feel like I'm bettering myself. I was inspired to come home and do the dishes. That's pretty fucking major, seeing as I'm one of those people who'll let the sink pile up with dishes for weeks at a time.
That might not seem like much, but I have been working so hard at improving myself and my responses to all the changes in my life. To enjoy class AND bang out a loathed chore in one night wouldn't have happened two years ago.
My apologies for not keeping up with everyone's journals. There has just been so much to do recently. None of it is particularly exciting though.
Ed and I haven't had sex in about two weeks. To me, that's like 3 months. I need some lovijng, but I don't think I'll be getting it tonight, with my lovely ensemble of tube socks and an old mustard-stained t-shirt.
Tell me what your favorite movie was in the sixth grade, Mine was (hides face) D2:The Mighty Ducks.
That might not seem like much, but I have been working so hard at improving myself and my responses to all the changes in my life. To enjoy class AND bang out a loathed chore in one night wouldn't have happened two years ago.
My apologies for not keeping up with everyone's journals. There has just been so much to do recently. None of it is particularly exciting though.
Ed and I haven't had sex in about two weeks. To me, that's like 3 months. I need some lovijng, but I don't think I'll be getting it tonight, with my lovely ensemble of tube socks and an old mustard-stained t-shirt.
Tell me what your favorite movie was in the sixth grade, Mine was (hides face) D2:The Mighty Ducks.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
you know that i admire you so much, i was SO so so happy you guys came to hang out with me and it was such an honor to be able to hold little Emily. i can't explain why right now, i'm not ready.
but thank you and frEd for letting me fall all over her, LITERALLY!!! HA!!
watching my sister grow up was and is the most rewarding experience of my life. i know how you feel as a mother and wife.
oh boy this is long. well anyway, here goes. for a long time i was embarrassed to ask to hold anyone's child; i've still been terrified to meet my nephew, who has down syndrome, 1 year old now b/c i'm terrified my family won't let me touch him b/c i was always perceived as somebody scary, for my appearance and beliefs, some in part thanks to my mother.
i thought i wouldn't be able to hold Emily because i would shake or cry or something and that didn't happen and you and Ed weren't afraid of me, you both trusted me even though my damn shoes were awful. i was SO terrified i could've dropped her but i was also so terrified to let her go. i couldn't believe you brought a stroller when you had an extra set of arms that day.
i really treasure buying that cd when i wouldn't hand her over and said i've held cats before so i'm fine, it was a pretty funny thing to say.
but i was just so happy because i was overcoming a long fear of just being, i don't even know. maybe a long fear of just being loved, and i was so overwhelmed that Emily just let me do all that and overcome that.
i'm so happy that the best feedback today came from you and i cannot imagine what on Earth you could possibly have for me, Jesus! SO exciting!!! i almost want you and the family to see me this weekend b/c my uncle will be visiting (AND i have to pick up my damn last check!) and he still is fearful of my tattoos. i want him to see people like us doing it, you guys are doing something that I KNOW somebody somewhere has doubted you both. for, i feel it.
ughhh. he has a one year old too that i've never met.
i'm honored that you have an understanding of a lot of things that we both have in common that we've raved about recently and it can only come from people with so much love for family and such. you are overwhelmed by a greater power to snap into ferocious gear for the sake of the dignity of those who only have you and what you teach them and it's a hard job that gets shit on so badly, and is worse for young people. and when someone looks down upon you, oh shit. it's the same with how people defend themselves with religion yet they are respected more AND first before anyone else.
somehow, knowing and loving children for me is my religious uplifting, b/c my sister to this day holds so much faith in me and i can never describe how she breaks my heart all the time with her incredible spirit.
i'll call you tomorrow miss mama.
no visible sign of teeth yet. he is starting to play with his tounge a lot and showing some other signs. it will be soon.
how'd did you get into wrestling?(saw your post in PSW)