Fucked Up Fables #1 - Mary Had A Little Lamb
Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was black as sin
It bleat and bleat all day and night
And it caused such a din
Till one day sweet Mary had enough
Went to her garden shed
Took her father's scythe and then
Cut off the noisy bugger's head
Her daddy beat her black and blue
Upon seeing what she'd done
Continued to beat her twice a day
Till Mary got his gun
And while that drunk lay sleeping
With some strange woman in his bed
Mary tiptoed through the door
And pumped them full of lead
Mary's mum had gone away
She came home on the morn
And she was surprised to find
Her daughter sitting on the lawn
Mother was a junkie - she'd been out scoring smack
Mary made sure her last hit was a dull blade in her back
Mary was feeling frisky
And so she hit the town
And everywhere that Mary went
She cut people down
She met a dirty old man
Who pleaded for his life
He'd tried to feel her up but instead he felt her scythe
Soon the coppers came
To put an end to Mary's fun
The police surrounded her
Left her no place to run
They told her to drop her gun
And to drop her scythe as well
And that if she did not comply
They would send her straight to hell
But sweet Mary just smiled
(as we near the end of story)
For she had decided
To go out in a blaze of glory
She raised her scythe up high
And took one last mighty swing
And as it cleaved the air
Her dull rusty blade did sing
It hit the nearest piggy
And tore apart his neck
His screams turned into gurgles
And then he hit the deck
Mary howled with laughter
Laughed the laugh of the insane
The cops didn't think it was so funny
And put a bullet in her brain
And so it was that Mary died
Back on that fateful day
Her rampage finally ended
Although there are some who say
That she yet lives and haunts the earth
Though she does not draw breath
That the once sweet little Mary
Has become the Lady Death
The reaper is a spunk
And her pigtails drip with blood
And everywhere she walks
She leaves a crimson flood
And so before you go to dream
Mayhap say a prayer or two
Pray the Lord Your Soul to Keep
if Mary comes for you
Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was black as sin
It bleat and bleat all day and night
And it caused such a din
Till one day sweet Mary had enough
Went to her garden shed
Took her father's scythe and then
Cut off the noisy bugger's head
Her daddy beat her black and blue
Upon seeing what she'd done
Continued to beat her twice a day
Till Mary got his gun
And while that drunk lay sleeping
With some strange woman in his bed
Mary tiptoed through the door
And pumped them full of lead
Mary's mum had gone away
She came home on the morn
And she was surprised to find
Her daughter sitting on the lawn
Mother was a junkie - she'd been out scoring smack
Mary made sure her last hit was a dull blade in her back
Mary was feeling frisky
And so she hit the town
And everywhere that Mary went
She cut people down
She met a dirty old man
Who pleaded for his life
He'd tried to feel her up but instead he felt her scythe
Soon the coppers came
To put an end to Mary's fun
The police surrounded her
Left her no place to run
They told her to drop her gun
And to drop her scythe as well
And that if she did not comply
They would send her straight to hell
But sweet Mary just smiled
(as we near the end of story)
For she had decided
To go out in a blaze of glory
She raised her scythe up high
And took one last mighty swing
And as it cleaved the air
Her dull rusty blade did sing
It hit the nearest piggy
And tore apart his neck
His screams turned into gurgles
And then he hit the deck
Mary howled with laughter
Laughed the laugh of the insane
The cops didn't think it was so funny
And put a bullet in her brain
And so it was that Mary died
Back on that fateful day
Her rampage finally ended
Although there are some who say
That she yet lives and haunts the earth
Though she does not draw breath
That the once sweet little Mary
Has become the Lady Death
The reaper is a spunk
And her pigtails drip with blood
And everywhere she walks
She leaves a crimson flood
And so before you go to dream
Mayhap say a prayer or two
Pray the Lord Your Soul to Keep
if Mary comes for you
sydgirl:
Sydney SGAU end of year dinner and drinks 