sorrow

yes i am just trying to stay focused on he fact that no matter what hey have tro do to make me better, i will better in the end so its worth it!! plus im tough,and kinda sick in the head so this stuff doesnt bother memuch!! yeah a woman i do wedding updo's with knows a MACgirl really well so i kinda have a lil step up in getting a job and hopefully they will send me to their school!! wow i had a fucked up dream,which is totally normal for me. I have extremely detailed, disturbing, realistic, lucid dreams almost every night, depends on my state when i go to bed,hehe! but yeah i get into my dreams and sometimes have a hard time seperating myself from the dreams and reality when i awake. yeah Justin and I are goining to his family barbeque and i will get to meet more of his family!! its always exciting for me!! especially with him cuz i consider his family to be mine someday! man with allthis shit going on lately i really just want to go shopping or the salon and get something for myself you kno. but i have been broke for solongthat i dont even look at stuff. Ohwell im just gonna try and think positive about money and hopefully more will come my way!! i love nightmare befoe christmas!wewatched it last night,im such a cartoon anime dork!! I would like to do some anime sets in the future, its just getting the outfits thats hard,i mean i make clothes but thir costumes areso very intricate and sometimes impossible to makein real life. well im running out here and nowimjust mambling. have a groovy day!