Slept all day today. Feeling very lazy and guilty that I missed work. I deserve a good spanking. Why do I sometimes just want to curl up in bed and retreat from life? It's like I just want to go into hibernation and when I wake up everything will be good, a new beginning. I wonder about what is truly important to me. What do I really want? It seems impossible to be happy or at least content if you don't even know what you really want. Moan, moan, whinge, whinge. I feel like my life is not my own. Who inhabits this bag of bones? Eat, excrete, work, play, fuck and rear children. Is there anything more to life? It seems almost a curse that we have the ability to ask such questions. Perhaps the secret to happiness in not to ask them. Just live. But then the question is how? How should I live? I am not religious, and so I have no ready made instruction guide to tell me how I should live. I guess I have to work it out for myself. Moan, moan, whinge, whinge...
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I take the route of ignoring the big questions.