soeffinhappy

Mmmmmmmm. Sweet escape. You lay down, you close your eyes and wrap yourself in a blanket that's so big you have trouble untangling yourself from it in the morning. The phone rings but you barely hear it. Each time it sounds farther and farther away, like you're slowly walking through a tunnel and it's at the opening behind you.
Then it's gone.
So's everything else.
Jarring light and sound wake you up. Are these my friends?
Is this my family?
Who are these strange creatures, with their voices like thunder who disturb my slumber?
THWUMP.
The sound of waking up
but then
going back to bed.
An overwhelming sadness or an overwhelming apathy has fallen over me, I can't yet tell which. I can't exactly say I'm depressed, but I can't exactly say I'm happy. All the excitement and dissappointment has been drained from me. Maybe it will come back. I kinda like that stuff, so I hope it doesn't stay away long. Up's and downs are much better than plateaus. In the meantime, I don't feel like doing much, except maybe for nothing. I feel like doing that ALL the time. I wake up in the morning and want to stay wrapped up in my blanket(the red and black one that used to smell like joanne, then like amy, now like noone), the blanket so big it should have it's own ZIP code. Who can resist something so big and red and warm? It's like being born. No one wants to leave the womb, that's why babies look so miserable when they come out. Or maybe it's cause they're covered in vaginal gook. Definitely one or the other..
I'm wrong. I lied to you. Please forgive me, I offer my humblest and most sincere apologies. There is one thing I want to do. I want to go to Karate class ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Grooverider pointed out to me that it's an inferior method and he's right, but that's not the point. The point is it's teaching me the absolute basics, which is what I need to learn. I've only been in two fights and I lost one, so that means I lost FIFTY PERCENT OF THE FIGHTS I'VE BEEN IN!!! Plus I don't really know how to fight. The only reason I won that one was because the dude attacked me with both hands over his head. Plus he was slow. And fat. And a worse fighter than me. But that's off the subject. The point here is that I LOVE KARATE!!! For the first time in a long time I'm using my body for something. I'm honing my limbs and muscles into instruments. I'll take Karate til I feel comfortable and then explore other styles. Tae Kwon Do or Kenpo perhaps. Or both. The world is my Kung Fu oyster.
Question of the day: Name one person who you were completely attracted to but were scared to death of.


P.S. I hope I didn't offend anyone by removing them from my friends list but now I have TEN ROCKIN PICTURES!!!! OWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!