socialcoma

Today is the third day of the rest of my life.

August 28th, 2002

Not much is happening. I was a bad girl yesterday and ate Chinese food for dinner, but I tried to compensate by walking all the way home, which is a good half a mile. I stopped from entering my house when I saw my ?stepfather?s? car parked outside the house. That mad radiates terrible vibes, for me at least. So instead of entering the domain I sat on the stairway in the parking lot next door making phones calls. Maybe someone would like to hang out with me. Gillian was packing her things getting ready for the big move to the city. The lucky girl gets to dorm in the city. So she was out. Lance was no where to be found, thought I spent a good thirty minutes talking to his mother, whom I?ve taken quite a liking too. As if I?m to say my judgement on character is pristine. However, she is great to talk to on the phone. My last phone call was to my boyfriend Daniel, he was busy making shelves? or installing them. He?d not called me back the entire evening. I was worried, and continued to worry till 4 am. No sleep. Damn these trials of ?love?.


Seven hours later here I am. Plans for today consist of me debating whether I should spend time with Lance or break promise and spend the day with Danny having sex in my rarely empty house. Deep down in my heart I want to go back to my house, but even deeper I know I?d just be chipping away at my friendship with Lance. I have three friends I trust to the hilt, and boyfriend who I love very much, but sometimes he?s just too everything. Too possessive, too ignorant, this being my expressive opinion. Maybe, just maybe I am the ignorant one. Regardless, Lance is important to me too. One more other option is to not hangout with either males and simply go home, retire to my bed. That possibility attracts the most since I am with out sleep. Hopefully I can hold out today at work till at least three o?clock this afternoon. Life can never be boring ? too many godforsaken decisions.