I shared some of this on @luciloser's IG, but I'm going to share it here, and provide an update. First, some background... I was in an almost ten year relationship that ended three years ago. In hindsight, we just weren't right for each other and we should have ended it a lot sooner. Despite that, the relationship ending wrecked me pretty badly. I only started putting myself back out there two months ago. As a result, I haven't had sex in over three years.
I'm a fairly shy person around people I don't know, so meeting women and talking to them is difficult for me. Saturday night was a bit of an exception, though. Maybe it was the alcohol. Anyhow, I ended up chatting up a fair number of women at the bar I went to. The problem is that no less than four of them were married. The rest were young enough to be my daughters (which I didn't know at the time), and one of those women was there with her mom (which I also didn't know at the time). Awkward...
I'm also on a few dating sites, but haven't had a whole lot of luck with them. I've made a total of four matches on Tinder, three of whom just fucking ghosted me. The other woman I matched with has shit going on in her personal life that makes it hard for her to reply to messages. On Bumble, I've matched with one person, and she's from the Quad Cities. I've matched with five people on OkCupid, got ghosted by two, and told by one that she wasn't looking for a relationship. I've sent messages to the other two, but haven't received replies. In one case, it's been about a week. Plenty of Fish has way too many fake scammer accounts, but I still use it. I've gotten ghosted a lot on that site. There's one woman I'm talking to there who hasn't ghosted me, but we just started chatting yesterday.
I'm weird and awkward. I make bad puns and really obscure references. I serve my sarcastic quips dry. Meeting new people is the only high stress situation I've ever been in where the stress gets to me. Sometimes I can hear my brain telling the rest of me, "I wish you weren't so fucking awkward, bud."
