In the midst of doing a ton of homework and it just floods over me...the boy I became really close with and went to visit about a month ago, hasn't talked to me since a week after I visited him. I feel sick to my stomach, I feel like hitting something, running away, anything. This weight at the core of my being is pulling me down with it. I hate that I'm so busy my emotions have been on the back burner, because it's moments like this they come at me full force. God it hurts. And I want to hate him, but mostly I just miss him. I've moved past wanting to be with him, but it's the feeling of loss associated with the closeness and intimacy that you share, that's what's hard to get around. I just wrote a lot, and I could write so much more. It's raining outside and I hope it will wash away all these lost feelings with it. Is it time for me to get out of here, move on, start anew. Ahhhh to be in the Tetons once more.
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