I made this journal in the wee hours of 09/06/04. Power was restored last night, and the cable was restored a lil while ago. I am about to go apply for a few jobs... make a deposit in the bank and see what creatures are stirring after the wake of this annoying storm.
Hurricane Frances. Bah. I don't like you. You stripped me of power. You stripped me of control.
This weekend went well overall, I guess I could say. I hung out with Chris and Krystal on Saturday. We got our piercings done. It was great fun had by all. I realized that I like her a lot more now then before though. I have known this girl for quite a long time, but only now do I feel that I am getting to know her. She is freaking beautiful. We both share a lot of common thoughts and beliefs. Among which is that pain does equal pleasure in certain scenarios. That I think is hot in itself. She is so close to the family that she is welcome to come and go as she pleases and she is around quite often. I think I am going to take advantage of that. We have a semi similar background engrossed in dysfunction. Thoughts on life are very similar, even up to the point of thinking that the kids that we have (respectively) will be a little odd themselves.
I want to toy around with this situation. I want to bleed it out, and see how far things can go.
I have been feeling weird lately. I like my image for the most part. I don't wanna look like a freaking prep. I don't want to look like a goth. Yet I feel the need to clean up a bit more. Wear more khakis. I got my Adidas shoes and they feel and look pretty good. Style. It is what I need to redefine. My hair is now short. It isn't all over the place like it used to. I loved that look, and still do, but I want a break for a lil bit. I want to see what subtle changes do.
I am hooked. All different things. Not even by the time my first piercing was done was I already thinking about what my next project would be. I need to pick up a guitar again... and start playing. Having fun. Enjoying life again. I feel like I want and need to. Only recently have I really thought about it. For 3 years I have slaved away at a dead end job. Well I shouldn't say that. It didn't get bad until about a year ago. I think it is time for me to move on as well. Join the enemy? Perhaps. I will be just as expendable there. I need somewhere that is not as restrictive. Somewhere where I won't have to worry about covering up my piercing. Where I won't have to lie through my teeth to customers. Where I can have fun again. Maybe just somewhere where I get paid what I deserve. I don't really know. I just know that I want something better. I am going to get it.
How have I wasted so much time. High school was a waste. Most of the classes were either for nothing, or they weren't what I should have been taking. I regret that now. I regret some of my past relationships. Well maybe not, but the way things went down wasn't the way it should have been. I have had my good moments and bad ones, and have learnt from mistakes made. Bite me. Scratch me. Tie me down, then let me do the same to you.
Hurricane Frances. Bah. I don't like you. You stripped me of power. You stripped me of control.
This weekend went well overall, I guess I could say. I hung out with Chris and Krystal on Saturday. We got our piercings done. It was great fun had by all. I realized that I like her a lot more now then before though. I have known this girl for quite a long time, but only now do I feel that I am getting to know her. She is freaking beautiful. We both share a lot of common thoughts and beliefs. Among which is that pain does equal pleasure in certain scenarios. That I think is hot in itself. She is so close to the family that she is welcome to come and go as she pleases and she is around quite often. I think I am going to take advantage of that. We have a semi similar background engrossed in dysfunction. Thoughts on life are very similar, even up to the point of thinking that the kids that we have (respectively) will be a little odd themselves.
I want to toy around with this situation. I want to bleed it out, and see how far things can go.
I have been feeling weird lately. I like my image for the most part. I don't wanna look like a freaking prep. I don't want to look like a goth. Yet I feel the need to clean up a bit more. Wear more khakis. I got my Adidas shoes and they feel and look pretty good. Style. It is what I need to redefine. My hair is now short. It isn't all over the place like it used to. I loved that look, and still do, but I want a break for a lil bit. I want to see what subtle changes do.
I am hooked. All different things. Not even by the time my first piercing was done was I already thinking about what my next project would be. I need to pick up a guitar again... and start playing. Having fun. Enjoying life again. I feel like I want and need to. Only recently have I really thought about it. For 3 years I have slaved away at a dead end job. Well I shouldn't say that. It didn't get bad until about a year ago. I think it is time for me to move on as well. Join the enemy? Perhaps. I will be just as expendable there. I need somewhere that is not as restrictive. Somewhere where I won't have to worry about covering up my piercing. Where I won't have to lie through my teeth to customers. Where I can have fun again. Maybe just somewhere where I get paid what I deserve. I don't really know. I just know that I want something better. I am going to get it.
How have I wasted so much time. High school was a waste. Most of the classes were either for nothing, or they weren't what I should have been taking. I regret that now. I regret some of my past relationships. Well maybe not, but the way things went down wasn't the way it should have been. I have had my good moments and bad ones, and have learnt from mistakes made. Bite me. Scratch me. Tie me down, then let me do the same to you.