Oh dear....my birthday is looming ahead. Turning 30 has never been such a more reality-churning moment on so many levels. This "suprise" party(lol) that is being planned by people(me mostly) is becoming more of a nuisance than a fun filled, high hopes event. I'm picking things out on my own and I'm probably having to get my own cake lol. In the end, probably only four people will show up. So I ask myself, "what is the point of planning this?" People are coming just to hang out with each other; everyone, let's face it, we all have money issues. It's the way the world is right now. So, to set all of this up, to entertain guest(s), why?
I'm not getting younger, and while I do accept the fact that I will be thrust into an older gap of folk(by the way, thank you SG for forcing me to register as a geezer), what's the point of celebrating if everyone is too absorbed into their own problems/headspace? Ungrateful? No. I've fallen on my sword too many times in my past for the greater good(others) to be called that. Over-dramatic? No. I'm being realistic almost to the point of being painfully blunt here. The fact is, we live in an age where celebration is for the privleged, not the servant. We live in a society that is based on rewards, and I am not about to dangle a carrot in front of people just so that they can come to a party that they should have the common sense to flock to without a second thought! Think about it? Are you really turning down free food? Free drinks? Free dessert? A chance to meet people you otherwise wouldn't normally? As a side note, I've given up trying to merge the galaxies that are my new friends with my old friends. Too much work, too many excuses to have to hear.
So without further ado, I shall seek to bid adieu to my painful 20's and kick off my 30's, a decade filled with resentment from many(not from anyone here), victories for me, and success for myself and those that follow my example. And I will do this by enjoying my birthday on my own terms; by doing the things I love. I will feast on my favorite food alone. Eat my favorite cake alone. Drink beer alone, and then hop on over to a brothel or two to have my brains fucked out, for I especially enjoy that more than anything in this universe(why else would I have joined this site many many years ago?).
Self awareness.......it's happening.
I'm not getting younger, and while I do accept the fact that I will be thrust into an older gap of folk(by the way, thank you SG for forcing me to register as a geezer), what's the point of celebrating if everyone is too absorbed into their own problems/headspace? Ungrateful? No. I've fallen on my sword too many times in my past for the greater good(others) to be called that. Over-dramatic? No. I'm being realistic almost to the point of being painfully blunt here. The fact is, we live in an age where celebration is for the privleged, not the servant. We live in a society that is based on rewards, and I am not about to dangle a carrot in front of people just so that they can come to a party that they should have the common sense to flock to without a second thought! Think about it? Are you really turning down free food? Free drinks? Free dessert? A chance to meet people you otherwise wouldn't normally? As a side note, I've given up trying to merge the galaxies that are my new friends with my old friends. Too much work, too many excuses to have to hear.
So without further ado, I shall seek to bid adieu to my painful 20's and kick off my 30's, a decade filled with resentment from many(not from anyone here), victories for me, and success for myself and those that follow my example. And I will do this by enjoying my birthday on my own terms; by doing the things I love. I will feast on my favorite food alone. Eat my favorite cake alone. Drink beer alone, and then hop on over to a brothel or two to have my brains fucked out, for I especially enjoy that more than anything in this universe(why else would I have joined this site many many years ago?).
Self awareness.......it's happening.