sienna

So today was interesting. I just got back from a festival downtown where a girl and her boyfriend were blantantly hitting on me. Asked for the threesome and everything. Must say, I was pretty flattered. lolz.

I'm not really into the random hooking up anymore. I'm so over it and ready for something real. Too ready, I'd say. My friends keep telling me not to force it, especially after this last boy I was into pulled out the friend card on me & completely left me to discard all the feelings I had built up for him. It sucked. So needless to say, this single summer of mine hasn't been so sexy, but maybe it shouldn't be.

Maybe I need to focus on myself for awhile. After I spent my last relationship basically caring for a guy as my child for a year & with the bad luck I've had since breaking up with said guy, I think I'm realizing that being single isn't so bad. I'm already pulling an A in my online class bc I have less to distract me. I'm hanging out with my friends more and feeling like I have my own social life. I don't get "What are you guys doing tonight?" I don't have to worry about making time for someone else. It's just me, whether I'm going out and living it up or staying in and bettering my future in some way, shape or form. I feel really motivated and on track for the first time in a long time.

And while sometimes I think it would be nice to have someone to support me on my journey, I'm hoping that by the end of it, there will be someone waiting to enjoy my success with me. And he'll probably be better than all the other losers who broke my heart along the way.