sid

I feel like such a creep commenting on all your posts here and on IG, but I really feel for you. Also Jack's Mannequin is awesome- I love "The Resolution". Anyway, I just feel like we're incredibly similar in some ways. You've been through so many more things than most people could imagine and so the way you feel is actually really normal and understandable. I also often feel like this, and it's honestly like my own personal little hell. Being chronically ill is awful, because it seems to take away everything and leave you isolated and unable to see the future. At least that's how I feel constantly, especially being bedridden for the past year. I know it's hard with a chronic illness, but I truly find that what helps me the most is taking a trip somewhere or seeing friends and dressing up and taking photos. If I can't leave my bed, I obsessively watch horror movies and anime. If my body will not leave me alone and is in pain, lately I've been taking warm baths and putting in peppermint/green tea/chamomile tea bags. If I have weed of some sort of THC & CBD capsules or oil, I take that and try to force myself to do something. Then I try my best to go back to distracting my brain. Or something else that's been really great is joining a support group- I do not know yet if I have chronic fatigue syndrome/myalgic encephalomyelitis, but my doctor wants to diagnose me with it after a year of being bedridden with various symptoms- so I attended a CFS/ME meeting here in my town and it just made me feel SO validated and less isolated. Or you can join Facebook support groups, which are awesome, because people there get it. I think ultimately, one of the best things to do is to reach out to other chronically ill people/spoonies- because we know how hellish living is when you're trapped and have tried everything and you're just still in so much pain. I really hope that helps you, and I truly hope I did ramble too much. You seem like such a crazy strong person, and I genuinely am grateful that I am not the only chronically ill/rare disease gal on this site. That being said, I am truly sad that your body makes you suffer so much too. I really hope that you can find some solutions and that you don't give up. Sometimes the only thing that keeps me going is just reminding myself that one day I want to be here for people like me and to help them. I want to be the person I needed for them. I'm sending you so, so much love. You truly are not alone, and I hope you find relief. <3 xoxo

Also my awesome babe @stormyent also has EDS, so maybe she can help more than me, as my illness is autoimmune/inflammatory. <3