(photo below taken of @kiley and me at Bar Sinister's Halloween party in Hollywood, CA)
It's 5:00 AM here in what my watch is telling me is 28° outside my window in this not-so-sleepy Colorado city. Tomorrow will mark the one year anniversary that a crazed zealot went to our local Planned Parenthood and killed 3 people, wounding several others in the process. That man was most likely a follower of a "youtube preacher", who I won't name as to not give any hits to, but he actually called his followers to murder people at PP in a video posted merely hours before this shooting. He pulled the video down after hearing of this, but it is mirrored on other sites. Why no one has arrested this so-called "preacher" for putting the idea into Mr. Crazy's head, but he is deemed unfit to serve trial because he took an insanity plea. They are still charging him with the murders of those innocent people and the attempted murder of the others who were at, nearby, or in the building once he's on medication or whatever.
Yesterday, the day after Thanksgiving, a Colorado State Trooper was struck and killed by a semi truck, which they are saying it was on purpose, while he was responding to an accident scene. Last year on the very same day, exactly one mile from that spot, another officer was murdered the same way.
Hate is consuming our country and our world. Things seem crazier every single day, yet I'm the one who needs to be on medications for depression and anxiety. I think my mental illnesses stem, not only from my Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, but also from the callous nature of people. I don't trust many people anymore. I feel like anytime I say something, it's going to be told to someone it shouldn't be told to and laughed about. I know for a fact that there has been some leaked information from private groups even here on SG to people because some have written blogs about the very things of sensitive nature that I have shared with others.
This community is pretty much my safe haven. We SGs, normally, take care of each other. Or, at least, that's one of the thoughts behind it. We are the tough, we are the warriors, we stick together and defend each other, and I do get that sense of safety still with a good portion of the girls in LA. They make me feel like I'm more at home than when I go back to the East Coast and see my mom, and if LA weren't so damned expensive and my husband didn't have such a good job with real good Health Insurance and I didn't have such a great team of Doctors helping me through my EDS, I'd move in a heartbeat.
But the bad that comes with California is the humidity, which immediately can make my joints inoperable. It's one of the same reasons I don't visit my family much. They live in a coastal state. Rhode Island to be exact. And every single vacation my family ever took me on was to another place, even another country, just so they could sit on the beach, just like they do at home. I never found the point of spending thousands of more dollars just to sit on a beach elsewhere.
I like history, archaeology, museums, indigenous art. In fact, I spent most of my time at school for music in the MFA in Boston, just sitting there, taking photos with my 35mm SLR, and writing music that was inspired by a certain piece of art. Mostly ancient art moved me in such a way that I can't explain... I also loved Renaissance art so much, I ended up with a piece of it tattooed to me (and I finally got to see the piece in person [again] in the Uffizi in Florence, Italy). The MFA inspired me in ways I didn't think it would, and when there was a chance for me to study Egyptology, Pre-Columbian Meso-American archaeology, and Renaissance Art History through a program exchange between my school and Boston University, I took my opportunities to take all those classes, even though I didn't need to.
Sorry for the tangent... It's just nice to remember the things that I now have in my mind thanks to those classes. Things I never dreamed of being able to learn. I also took archaeology in high school, and I really wanted to major in it, but my parents didn't let me and made me to go to the prestigious music school I was accepted to. They thought I'd live on the East Coast forever, but I didn't. It was too toxic for me there, and I'm glad I left.
I know there are selfish and racist people everywhere in the world, but to live among them and have to pretend to care about their little aggressions or their status symbols, and bite your tongue at every racist remark, it was pretty much killing me inside. Seriously, if you could go back to my blogs here on SG from when I was 19-22, you would see how miserable I was. I just couldn't stand my own family. I couldn't stand the people who were turning out to be fake "friends". I couldn't take the 24/7 loneliness with my own thoughts, you know?
Colorado does have a lot more chill to it. I'm in an area where it's the cusp of the rich meets middle class and has some poorer areas surrounding either side of it. It's definitely a melting pot here, and I'm super okay about that! I mean, I have cool neighbors and shitty ones, but that's neither here nor there. Although there is that dickface who has a confederate flag flying on his truck that is set up to "roll coal". If you've never heard that term before, you really need to look it up. It's illegal and dangerous, not to mention what it's doing to the environment!
Anyway, my point being is selfishness is killing the world. People who only give a rat's ass what happens to them and their families, but never give a single thought about the poor or disabled. 9 times out of 10, when I go to the grocery store, the handicapped spots are full of non-permitted cars. You know those people who are "just running in for a few seconds". Well, thank you kind capable human, but you're taking up that spot is going to mean the difference between being able to walk to through the entire store or only half of it. Heaven forbid if I'm on my crutches that day.
(you'll have to wait a week to see the rest of the uncensored photos when "Pastel Stars" hits Member Review!)
Selfish assholes literally go into stores that sell collectables and damage the boxes so the person who gets there next's purchase isn't worth as much, and I wish I were kidding about that.
I will probably post a happier blog when my first set shot in 4 years goes up, and it was shot in April, btw, so it sat in review forever because there are certain people who have more than one set go up in a week, sometimes in a day.
If I could help out staff at all, I'd be able to sit there and move sets from the same persons to a few months apart, and I'd bring back the Member Review queue having maybe 2 or 3 hopeful sets between SG sets or something to make the playing field fair, but I'm not a member of staff, and they have expressed interest in my ideas about the queue, but there's just so much else to be done for them, and they are a very small, but capable staff. You should really thank staff for all they do out of that tiny little office near some real crazies in Hollywood (but some great food!). Trust me, I know all the stuff they are busy doing, second-hand from how busy @kiley is/or how long she takes to respond to my texts. 😝
(below: cosplaying as the character this woman helped create; a Muslim teenager from New Jersey who gains super powers after a "mist" changes her. She becomes the new Ms. Marvel.)
Thanks Staff for all your hard work, in the least ass-kissing way possible. 😝
x0x0,
☠️-Sid-☠️
P.S. I'm participating in a gift exchange through redditgifts! Join me in having tons of fun! via http://www.redditgifts.com/?inv=Bnaz
