11/25. Every year, it has me in tears. My own mother told me, "It's been years, get over it!", but because I had to be the "strong one" when it all went down on *MY* birthday in 2003. I had to hold it all in because no one would let me talk or cry about it.
Today is my dad's birthday. He died on mine. It was rather sudden, and partially due to the genetic illness he passed onto me, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. His father also died due to an aortic dissection, which happens to people with EDS. So, basically, I was "blessed" with both shitty types of EDS from them.
I'm reminded of my father every time I feel the pain of my joints dislocating, every time I go broke from paying for my medication, and still not being able to afford the CBD oil that helped me so much, even with their patient discount, I'm reminded. It's annoying being sad and alone all the time.
At least one good thing has come out of 11/25: It's also my dog's birthday! Today she's 6 and still as cute as she was as a puppy:
Baby Penelope:
Penelope now:
^If a pet sits on top of a box full of comics and cosplays, it's fair game to put a piece of one of those cosplays on them^
^She keeps my coat and hat warm, even though I shouldn't be leaving them on a chair^
But anyway, I'm trying to be strong today. I have broken down a couple of times, so I guess I've failed. I just hate being all alone on days like this. It's not fair that I am not considered by people who know this day hurts me... I'm so very tired.
x0x0,
☠Sid☠
