sickgirl78

so, today would've been four years. I was doing ok all day until now. Night time is the hardest time. I feel most alone after dark. Even when I go out, I'm still coming home to an empty house and laying in an empty bed. Tomorrow makes a month since he left and it feels like a lifetime. I keep having horrible dreams about it happening over and over again. I wish I could be mad at him or hate him or something, maybe it would make it easier. I just don't know how to turn it off. Any of it, the love for him, the want of having him around, the random sadness and the numbness. And the feeling of being so empty.