so.. as usual, so fucking much has been happening!!!!!!!!
... I finally found a place to move to and have almost finished moving in all my stuff.. i have been here for the past week now and it rules!! 
dodgy neighbourhood though.. i think i am living in the ghetto of brisbane.. but it rules... i am so glad to have finally moved house.. i have been living with my parents saving money for beserk clothing, my clothing company over the past 2 1/2 years and I am finally at a point where it is going well so I can finally afford to move out!!! plus I was totally taking over their house with stock and equipment and needed space badly!.. So i have moved and i have stuff everywhere which is driving me crazy 
i hate being unorganised?!?!..plus I am right at the most important time for organising the manufacturing of all the items for the next range.. and to make it worse i got 16 huge boxes of t-shirts delivered today, i thought they were coming tomorrow and i was going to have it all cleared and ready for sorting them out, but i they came early so they are stored between the mess.. so I really should be sorting it all out now..............
this is one of my rooms (i have two this size..)
in progress.. still stuff everywhere!!..
it is going to rule when i am finished!!.......
m/
i got broadband at my new place.. holy fuck it rules..!!
.. i used to get so pissed off at my last connection.. so i have decided to post more regularly on here, i always felt bad about updating before writing back to everyone who had written to me.... 
but i just don't have the time, so i will write to everyone when i can.. i promise.......... 
i am going out this wednesday night to see The Explosion at the Rev.. i haven't even heard them before.. so basically i am going to get drunk!.. plus be the merch bitch for these crazy boys who are also playing....razorhurst..sorry guys.. you know i had to use this picture.. its all about the skulls....
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My foot is kind of getting better!?.. i have been limping for 5 fucking weeks now cause of those cunts
(see previous entry..).. i am trying to walk normally now and it is really hard cause i have been walking weird for so long now... but hopefully soon the pain shall go...
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i had a celebratory party by myself on friday night cause i found a place, beserk is going well and things are looking good in my life!!
.. i had indian and corona beers.. i was going to get mexican but it was closed.. but the indian was fucking nice and coronas rule.. here in my celebratory meal..........
So.. all in all my life is pretty good!!!!!!!!!
i love being a business grrl.. just have to get other areas of my life sorted.. 
.. why does sex have to fuck everthing up???.. but seriously.. i have defiently decided there really is no way to have long, monogamous, happy relationships.. it just doesn't happen and i can't see one example around me of it actually working?!!.. who first 'married' people together anyway? 
.... sooo the only way to remain happy is to look beyond the sex and be happy with allowing the person you are with to fuck other people or fucking other people together in group situations?!? is this right? i really don't think humans are supposed to be with one person.... and if so is that emotionally possible to deal with? Do i always go on about this?......... .....................
i always fucking think about this subject.....
*****
i fucking love my tattoo..!!
here is a better pic than last time.. I can't wait to get colour..!
I really believe that everyone has a number and for some reason, as much as I don't want it to be this number, my number is defiently 69. It is always everywhere in my life.. my pin number/credit cards/accounts always contain 69 and i nearly always get 69 when i have to take a number at supermarkets for waiting.. does this mean something?
.. and to prove it here is my receipt from buying my groceries tonight....
5 things i love ::
.. unpacking, decorating and creating a sexy place to live..
.and finding things in boxes i forgot i owned..
.. fingerless gloves - warm and still functional..
haha
.. cherry blossoms - i want to go to japan..
.. new tattoos.. i want new ink already.....!!
.. a certain boy...but love is such a fucked up word.. who created love anyway.. does anyone know where this word first came from??
.. escaping this world through different substances... ?!? is this wrong?
well..i had better get back to unpacking.. promise i will write when i get a chance!!!!!!!!!!!...............
SIARA
XXXXX
***** CHECK OUT MY NEW WEBSTORE for Beserk Clothing! Anyone that signs up for an account will receive a Beserk pack in the mail in early october with beserk stickers + the new mini catalogue for the Beserk Range II*****
VIEW 25 of 40 COMMENTS
The way you state this suggests to me that you are not happy with your sexual/emotional situation and have concluded that to be happy you have to allow your partner to do something you arent really comfortable with. Im not sure if that is the correct interpretation of your words but that is how they read to me.
My own experience has been that sexual intimacy helps cement a bond with another person and build a connection that exists on various levels. I think that is what most people really want. I think it would be really hard to feel the trust and confidence that makes for an emotionally satisfying and successful relationship if my partner wanted to fuck with other people. I guess it just depends on whether you can separate the biological intimacy form the emotional intimacy. I cant do that.
how ya goin? i am back
hope the Berserk biz is goin well