I'm gonna get pretty personal with this blog, but I have to for you to understand the situation and for me to get some SOLID Advice. Ya see yesterday I was walkin' on cloud nine. Today... well i'm in complete despair. I feel like am riding the biggest tipsy turvy ride the world has to offer. It all stems from this wonderful guy that i've been talkin' to. It all started about 3 months ago. I was just getting out of a relationship and he was single for a year after his wife left him. Anyways, we hooked up without any expectations. More or less we started seeing each other a lot to fill the empty spaces in our lives, including physical ones. Slowly, I found myself hooked on him. I tried to give him a little nudge and persue a relationship, but he says "I have feelings but I'm not ready to deal with my emotions". Okay, what does that even mean? Is he scared, insecure, trust issues... or am I just a piece of ass? I tend to think he ACTUALLY does care just from some of his reactions. First off he has stayed the night without getting a piece of ass, secondly he always kisses me goodbye in the morning and everytime I tell him I give up and not to talk to me he tries to talk me out of it. However, he still won't commit. Now, the reason I was on cloud nine is because even though he won't commit I swear we make the most incredible love. A couple nights ago was so intense...the whole package; the sex, the touching, eye contact and the emotions. Afterward, I layed in his arms as he held me close and we both fell asleep. the next day I was smiley, giddy and insanly happy. Was I only euphoric because it was good sex? Am I wasting my time with a man who will never commit? Does he really have feelings... or is he just sayin that for the sex? I never would have let a man string me along for this long... there is something about him though and I am determined to make him mine... am I being nieve?
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