sheddlefty

Battling aggression with creativity is a skill I've yet to master but have surpassed my novice self. Today a circumstance arose when my brother and I clashed heads for about the third time in a week. I love him, he has stuck his neck out for me many times and I have done the same for him on numerous occasions. But living with him lately has become somewhat of a burden. Sharing expenses like paying rent and utilities has increased to an overwhelming capacity as he is working with little debt and I am relying on my savings with quite a bit of debt to add to the stressful situation that life has placed me in. Food isn't cheap and I'm finding that I purchase food quite often due to his hunger as well as mine, but how can I possibly support the both of us when it comes to nourishment? I get that I am too nice of a person to deny someone of food when they are hungry but at some point, I just might be the one sticking my hand out waiting for a fill. Certain things have occurred to question his judgment but I only know my life and cannot possibly comprehend why anyone does the things they do. I just don't want to go broke based on decisions others have made that now impact me severely. I keep my head raised and fight off this frustration through writing, drawing, creating music, working out, and venting to those who care to listen...which I guess would include anyone reading this blog...so I thank you from the bottom of my heart

I'm doing pretty good for myself, even though life can be a son of a bitch at times, I find absolutely no pleasure in sulking and dwelling on events that cannot be easily reversible. I'm in debt, I can't just magically eliminate what I owe. I must continue to struggle in order to completely dust off the dirt that has been laid upon me. When that moment comes, ohhh man am I going to throw a party for the record books!!!

I will say that Chicago's political corruption and in fact all financial institutions are demonic and devious and all those who steal from the poor and feed the rich shall someday be imprisoned and tortured beyond any fathomable imagination. I for one will have a first row seat to the circus that will unfold upon them. Laying off marijuana for the sake of finding decent employment has been a stressful case for me as I have been a smoker for years, hell I even carve my own wooden pipes and create ingenious devices to smoke our Mother's herb. I just imagine a life that is as close to Utopian as possible with the girl I love and admire with every ounce of energy in my being...that is what gets me through my long and arduous days. Even though this person is has not been discovered yet

I truly love and respect all of you, we are young enough to where this world as we know it has cracks in it's infrastructure that we are able to visibly note. We are going to see a new society be born in our lifetimes, aren't you excited??? I sure am!!! There is no possible way that we can continue to burn fossil fuels at alarming rates, erode the land for carnivorous reasons, continue to fight in wars and make enemies, place values on material possession with imaginary currency (paper currency? please its all digital!), the value of the US dollar has so greatly depreciated that it's shocking to think that we can continue on with this flawed monetary system...chart of US dollar losing value, and I can go on and on about global issues that can be easily corrected. As Rush said in the song The Temple of Syrinx, "And the meek shall inherit the Earth!" It's just a matter of time before this global empire witnesses a fall.

Ok, it's time I grabbed a bite and ended this blog. Delicious vegan dishes await me as well as full vegetable, herbal, and floral gardens in my future


Much Love
~A~S~