shamelessly

Feeling something surface again.
Not a fan.
I love myself, and most major pieces of my identity.
But this.. my self destructive other half.
The one that crumbles all that is well.
Is coming up front ..
I am trying to push away the need to cause myself more damage.
Fact is i will totally win. But i hate the lingering emotion of discomfort, and dislike.

Work, is work. I am doing way to many 12 hour days, way too many extra shifts, way too many hours.
My body feels, my mind is getting bland.
My life feels bland.

But in time, reaping the rewards will occur, and hopefully i will not be too down to enjoy them.