ever wonder if you make your partner happy? now ever wonder if the reason there not happy is because your not right in the head? I have severe PTSD. it makes me do weird and stupid things sometimes. I never liked who I was as soon as I came home from combat. I didn't seek help until 4 years later. I'm not suicidal or homicidal. I don't freak out at people and i'm rather call and collected. i'm not a hunter but I have no problem killing another huan being if I have to, only if I have to. if that person attacks or tries to rape or molest what has become or is my family I will take there life like it was my job. no tears, no fears, no nightmares............
I am worried that after 10 years of dealing with my issues she can no longer handle me. that I have past my crazy date a while ago and that with everything else in her life I might be the one thing making her worse rather than better. I asked her...... she does not know if i'm right or not. that makes me worry more. there is a chance I might be right. i'm 30 years old and a disabled vet. who else in this world would even give me the time of day. besides that we are doing a separation and I don't even have good people outside of ones I don't want to talk about this stuff with to talk to. who do I turn to for help when i'm driving myself mad? I don't know what to do and could use some real help on this one. please don't just ignore me. it will just make me more alone on this.
I am worried that after 10 years of dealing with my issues she can no longer handle me. that I have past my crazy date a while ago and that with everything else in her life I might be the one thing making her worse rather than better. I asked her...... she does not know if i'm right or not. that makes me worry more. there is a chance I might be right. i'm 30 years old and a disabled vet. who else in this world would even give me the time of day. besides that we are doing a separation and I don't even have good people outside of ones I don't want to talk about this stuff with to talk to. who do I turn to for help when i'm driving myself mad? I don't know what to do and could use some real help on this one. please don't just ignore me. it will just make me more alone on this.
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mustangbeauty:
Certain changes and help can be found within yourself. .. no one can fix you but you hun. You need to find what's truly important. . What motivates you to get through it and be better.. if not for yourself then for her... I have anxiety and depression.. I let go of a long term relationship... life is tricky. . But it's all in how you deal, the people you keep close and enjoying the wonderful things or finding them.. have faith and hope things have a funny way of working out and sometimes we are own worst enemy.... be easy on yourself. . 
sgtpeters11:
I feel that I need to let go of the long tem and work on the now and soon to come. I want her so bad but if I ake her misrible than whats the point of me trying to fight for something that may only last a little longer before I ruin her. I just want her happiness right now. my happiness will come over years of me working and sticking with the hel I have sought. thank you all for the kind words ans encouragement