I'm pretty proud right now. I just rallied myself to turn in my column on time and change my outlook. I wasn't having a pity party necessarily, but I was definitely downward spiraling, feeling alone in what I'm up to, resenting that I don't have more support, and getting extremely worried about how I would make it through.
Somehow I came to remember that the tricky thing about depression is getting tangled in a web of thoughts that aren't helping, and then getting pulled down by them more and more as they add power to each other. So I got up to take a walk around, switch it up, and I ended up going two steps, and coming back to sit down and just power through to finish my column.
Just submitted it, which feels really good, especially since a few hours ago I didn't even care enough to figure out how I was going to finish or put in the effort to get it done or go somewhere to submit it. But what's even more satisfying is this feeling: the feeling that I did it, I snapped myself out of it, I can rely on myself, I am strong, and I changed my direction in just a small and simple little thing.
A victory for me, even if nobody else ever knows how it feels or what it's all about. I'm making it significant to me, and something not to forget!
Hope your weekends are going swimmingly.
xxo
Somehow I came to remember that the tricky thing about depression is getting tangled in a web of thoughts that aren't helping, and then getting pulled down by them more and more as they add power to each other. So I got up to take a walk around, switch it up, and I ended up going two steps, and coming back to sit down and just power through to finish my column.
Just submitted it, which feels really good, especially since a few hours ago I didn't even care enough to figure out how I was going to finish or put in the effort to get it done or go somewhere to submit it. But what's even more satisfying is this feeling: the feeling that I did it, I snapped myself out of it, I can rely on myself, I am strong, and I changed my direction in just a small and simple little thing.
A victory for me, even if nobody else ever knows how it feels or what it's all about. I'm making it significant to me, and something not to forget!
Hope your weekends are going swimmingly.
xxo
I don't know which column you write.... but i do know ALOT ABOUT DEPRESSION....
so i give you two thumbs up for getting through it...
I am bi-polar, amoung many other ailments.. so i know how difficult it can be....
when thoughts pile up and overwhelm your head - (i call that crisis building ) (i learned that in n/a, but it still refers to depression and overwhelment of thoughts )... you did the right thing by taking a break.... and i'm proud of you for not taking too much of a break and getting it done and turning it in....
You were saying something about support.....
Well, things are looking up girlie.... i've become your new Support Team... me and all my personalilities (haha).. no really .. I'm rooting for ya...
Well, i'm in bad pain right now. so i've got to go lay down, but wanted to stop by and say hi......
talk to you later..
daphnee