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serious_sabotage

Summerville, SC

Member Since 2006

Followers 54 Following 50

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Wednesday Feb 21, 2007

Feb 20, 2007
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Expectations; See also Guarunteed Dissapointment.

Well. Here I am again. Though I knew this path would stop somewhere, in the back of my mind I guess I didn't expect it to dead-end as abrubtly as it did. But you see, that's the underlying problem with EXPECTATIONS. Friendships usually begin like most types of unions begin. You meet someone, at some point ASSUME that you know them, then instinctively create the expectations that will define the meaning behind the relationship. Yet the thing we often fail to apply in addition to these expectations are BOUNDRIES. How is it that we forget boundries are the very thing that protect us from DISSAPOINTMENT and hurt? That's the trick. I think so many of us still have so much good inside of us that we believe everyone else does too. Sadly enough, it's just not true. We ALL have a limited amount of good. Some more than others, some less.

The next move that inevitably leads us to destruction is ASSUMPTION. We ASSUME that once a trust is established, the other person will fully reciprocate in the same manner that we ourselves exist in. That my friends(?) is the moment where we has set ourselves up for the fall. We then begin to RELY people to define our personal beliefs.

One thing I have recently come to understand is lesson in SELF RELIANCE. The only person you can EVER fully believe in is yourself. As my mother always says, " Who wipes your ass at the end of the day?? Who pays your bills? Who gets you up every morning and reminds you to breath? Never rely on someone else to do for you what only you can do for YOURSELF." That statement has never meant more to me than it does now.

So in closing, I offer you a tid bit of advice. Never set the bar too high. Try to remember to set boundries for yourself in the forging of relationships.Only truly rely yourself with for trust and guarunteed return. At the end of the day, the expections you have for YOU are the only ones that matter.




lostjohny:
hmm. i had feelings similar to these when i was going through my divorce. only after the separation/divorce did i realize that she had either changed into a completely diffrent person or hid who she really was.
i am at a point of who and when i might possibly trust or rely on again. i have put myself in a position where i am so busy, i am hoping time will relieve what contemplation can not.
Feb 21, 2007

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