SLAP! Yeah I deserve it. Walk a little bit, KICK MYSELF IN THE ASS. Yup needed that too. Keep on going...POW! That was me slapping myself in the forehead saying DAMN YOU IDIOT!
***********************************
Me: Bob, try this shot!
Bob: What is it?
Me: It's a Bottleslinger Martini.
Bob: What the hell is that?
Me: It's 2 oz of Jager and 2 oz of Tequila.
Bob: Are you gonna do one?
Me: Fuck no!
Bob: If your buying I'll drink one.
*Bob drinks one, says give me another one. I do...5 minutes later I go into the bathroom and Bob has the stall open and he's puking.*
Me: Bob! What are you doing dude?
Bob: A little puking rowdy!!!
Me: You want another shot?
Bob: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!
I go back to get one more and the bartender is like "The Jager is warm!" I tell her that is how the shot is supposed to be served, luke warm. She says "That's nasty!"
"Richie, put that fucking camera away. (FLASH) It's like a fucking strobe light dammit. (FLASH) Shit's getting on my nerves. (FLASH) That's all I can fucking see right now...that damn flash." Mike, yelling at me about taking random pictures of anyone, including him at the bar.
Below are the events that happened in our 20 minute wait at 2 am at the McDonalds drive thru...and we weren't waiting for other cars, WE were the reason for the wait.
Josh: Are you serving the 99 cent menu?
Drive thru chic (DTC): No, only the late night menu.
Me: Fuck, that's the expensive shit. Do you take Visa?
DTC: Sorry sir but we don't take credit cards at the drive thru
Me: We'll be back, we need to get money!
-We start to pull away. We moved maybe 5 feet-
Mike: Wait, do you have any money?
Me: Yeah like $11.
Mike: Why do we need to get money then?
Me: Cause I don't have enough loot to support both of your broke asses.
Mike: I got money!
Me: Fuck! Why didn't you say something before then?
-Josh puts the truck in reverse, drives back the 5 feet we moved forward-
Josh: Ok we're back
"This is way to hard to talk to you at this thing...I'll talk to you at the first window. Bub bye!" Josh trying to talk to the McDonalds DTC through the speaker thing.
After ordering our food, finally. It was ready, sitting at the window and Josh decides that he wants to super size everything. (Yeah that's right, we still got that shit. None of that skinny man meals here) As he gets a weird look from the DTC, he says "I've had enough of you for right now" and closes the drive thru window on her.
"I really wish I was having as much fun as you guys are right now" Vickie, the McDonalds DTC that we were harrassing.
Me: Hey do you know Meade, the manager?
DTC: Yes I do. He works here.
Me: That dude fired me way back in '93 when I worked at the West Kittanning McDonalds.
After that, I missed a lot of the conversation because for some odd reason I was talking to 2 really really wouldn't give me the time of day hot chics that were behind us and running up and down the drive thru asking people for beer. Of course I missed even more because I was locked out of the truck while Josh and Mike were inside laughing at me.
"Uh....is it too late to ask for more barbeque sauce for my nuggets?" Josh after we started to pull away, stopped, and went back to the window.
"Who the fuck ordered a super sized orange soda and why the hell did I get stuck with this shit" Me, last night.
***********************************
Me: Bob, try this shot!
Bob: What is it?
Me: It's a Bottleslinger Martini.
Bob: What the hell is that?
Me: It's 2 oz of Jager and 2 oz of Tequila.
Bob: Are you gonna do one?
Me: Fuck no!
Bob: If your buying I'll drink one.
*Bob drinks one, says give me another one. I do...5 minutes later I go into the bathroom and Bob has the stall open and he's puking.*
Me: Bob! What are you doing dude?
Bob: A little puking rowdy!!!
Me: You want another shot?
Bob: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!
I go back to get one more and the bartender is like "The Jager is warm!" I tell her that is how the shot is supposed to be served, luke warm. She says "That's nasty!"
"Richie, put that fucking camera away. (FLASH) It's like a fucking strobe light dammit. (FLASH) Shit's getting on my nerves. (FLASH) That's all I can fucking see right now...that damn flash." Mike, yelling at me about taking random pictures of anyone, including him at the bar.
Below are the events that happened in our 20 minute wait at 2 am at the McDonalds drive thru...and we weren't waiting for other cars, WE were the reason for the wait.
Josh: Are you serving the 99 cent menu?
Drive thru chic (DTC): No, only the late night menu.
Me: Fuck, that's the expensive shit. Do you take Visa?
DTC: Sorry sir but we don't take credit cards at the drive thru
Me: We'll be back, we need to get money!
-We start to pull away. We moved maybe 5 feet-
Mike: Wait, do you have any money?
Me: Yeah like $11.
Mike: Why do we need to get money then?
Me: Cause I don't have enough loot to support both of your broke asses.
Mike: I got money!
Me: Fuck! Why didn't you say something before then?
-Josh puts the truck in reverse, drives back the 5 feet we moved forward-
Josh: Ok we're back
"This is way to hard to talk to you at this thing...I'll talk to you at the first window. Bub bye!" Josh trying to talk to the McDonalds DTC through the speaker thing.
After ordering our food, finally. It was ready, sitting at the window and Josh decides that he wants to super size everything. (Yeah that's right, we still got that shit. None of that skinny man meals here) As he gets a weird look from the DTC, he says "I've had enough of you for right now" and closes the drive thru window on her.
"I really wish I was having as much fun as you guys are right now" Vickie, the McDonalds DTC that we were harrassing.
Me: Hey do you know Meade, the manager?
DTC: Yes I do. He works here.
Me: That dude fired me way back in '93 when I worked at the West Kittanning McDonalds.
After that, I missed a lot of the conversation because for some odd reason I was talking to 2 really really wouldn't give me the time of day hot chics that were behind us and running up and down the drive thru asking people for beer. Of course I missed even more because I was locked out of the truck while Josh and Mike were inside laughing at me.
"Uh....is it too late to ask for more barbeque sauce for my nuggets?" Josh after we started to pull away, stopped, and went back to the window.
"Who the fuck ordered a super sized orange soda and why the hell did I get stuck with this shit" Me, last night.