scarletharlet

Coming up at eleven...

I haven't always been the perky and out going person you all know! (That was sarcastic, teeming with sarcasms...)

I use to be a VERY angry, bitter, hurt little girl. I wore my damage parts like a shinny suit of bitterness, hurt, and rage. I bore it for all to see. It made me.

My freshman year I had a teacher, Mr. Koz, he cared about me. He saw me self destructing... he couldn't bare to watch it. He sat me down and told me I had to learn to set things free, or I was going to kill myself in tiny tiny increments.

I brushed it off, and got angry. At least outwardly. I was hurt, very hurt and that made me very very angry. I was a jerk to him, on purpose; I wanted him to sting like I did. I had recoiled back upon myself, back to suicide in tiny doses.

It took a long time, to take off my shinny suit of pain, and anger. I e-mailed him the first time one of my paintings was going to be in a gallery. He never e-mailed me back, and on opening night... he didn't come. I was heart broken; I wanted to show him I had change... no more tiny amount of suicide.

The show closed and my paintings came home, I guessed he had never seen them. I got a letter from him a few months later as I got ready to graduate. He has seen my work, when he knew I wouldn't have been there. He said he could tell I had let go, he could see all the bitterness in the paintings and he knew it wasn't with me anymore.

That was the day I finally took off the suit and put it away.

I'd like to think I am not that person. That she and me are very different people.

Now if only others had put there death suits away. I may have pegged the identity of 'tire slashing asshole.' to be confirmed soon.

If it is this person, I will seek an order of protect, and they will be arrested hopefully. This will not be pretty. This person is still angry from things that transpired 5 years ago. It's kind of sad...

In my life I'd like to say I've learned to let go, and I've learned not to regret my actions. It all gets me nowhere.

Thats about all I have to report.

Elmo's surgery when't off with out a hitch, one cyst and tooth removed. And he is just fine now. He fell over a few times after surgery when he tired to pee. It was cute in a dopey dog way.