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satsujin

Trashville

Member Since 2006

Followers 286 Following 258

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Monday Sep 03, 2007

Sep 3, 2007
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So, without getting into crazy details, I will simply say that this has been the worst couple of months in my life. Awful, awful, awful fucking summer.

I need to make some choices. What's worse is that I need to summon the courage to execute them. Thinking about them is frightening enough, and wells bile in my throat that I can either spit or swallow -- and both are unattractive choices. I'm calling on a lot of strength to deal with unfamiliar territory, and it's a hike that I don't know I have enough lung capacity to breathe for. I'm already hyperventilating with the tears, sweat and stress.

And here I thought I was tougher than this.

Humans are creatures of survival and I will ultimately test Spencer, Darwin, Lewottin -- you name 'em. I plan on makin' it. I will hopefully embrace change with as much grace as a cool breeze over water, and not the torrent of a moon-inspired tide. I don't plan on drowning.

But it's still hard to breathe.
rpg:
Change is sometimes frightening. Especially when the change MUST happen, or it is forced upon us. I know it was for me, at least twice in my life, maybe more often. My heart goes out to you. (((((hugs)))))
Sep 3, 2007
juliana:
I saw a patent application for this device that would allow someone to access the precious oxygen beyond the water bowl in a toilet, through a straw. The device was made for the purpose of being able to breathe in a bathroom, in the event of a high-rise building on fire.

I could see about getting you one of those.

... you know, ... 'cos I'm not able to loan you any courage. Even though I would.

I'm rooting for you.
Sep 5, 2007

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