A note you will never see:
when i close my eyes i see your face, your green eyes and how they make me melt when i look at you. There is nothing perfect about us but every moment that is good is worth all the rest. even knowing how much i will hurt in a few months when i leave. I will never try to act like i know what love is, maybe its just attraction and false hope of something that very obviously can not end well for either of us. but i do think im in love. its so strange to really feel something like this so strongly. it scares me and makes me wanna cry in a way. sometimes i think its just easier to end this now, lie and say i don't want you. so i won't feel the hurt that i know is comming for me.. it would be better for you as well. Your just as freaked out as i am. thats why we're always so messed up very second day. But when you kiss me, i forget all that, everything is perfect and i choke on my own words. good thing im so good at covering it up. I know i can play it so cool and chill.. wish i could just tell you all this. wish you would tell me what you really feel, instead of over thinking and changing your mind what you want from me every 5 seconds. No way do i believe that is such thing as true love, and happy ever after. im not a pre teen girly idiot. i have no illusion of how harch life really is. I don't want to feel like this, I don't want to melt every time you tell me you want me.. and i REALLY don't want to cry every time you push me away. but it happeneds anyway. and i know when i see you i will act just as cool and chill as always and you will have no clue i feel this way, cuz thats just the way it has to be.
when i close my eyes i see your face, your green eyes and how they make me melt when i look at you. There is nothing perfect about us but every moment that is good is worth all the rest. even knowing how much i will hurt in a few months when i leave. I will never try to act like i know what love is, maybe its just attraction and false hope of something that very obviously can not end well for either of us. but i do think im in love. its so strange to really feel something like this so strongly. it scares me and makes me wanna cry in a way. sometimes i think its just easier to end this now, lie and say i don't want you. so i won't feel the hurt that i know is comming for me.. it would be better for you as well. Your just as freaked out as i am. thats why we're always so messed up very second day. But when you kiss me, i forget all that, everything is perfect and i choke on my own words. good thing im so good at covering it up. I know i can play it so cool and chill.. wish i could just tell you all this. wish you would tell me what you really feel, instead of over thinking and changing your mind what you want from me every 5 seconds. No way do i believe that is such thing as true love, and happy ever after. im not a pre teen girly idiot. i have no illusion of how harch life really is. I don't want to feel like this, I don't want to melt every time you tell me you want me.. and i REALLY don't want to cry every time you push me away. but it happeneds anyway. and i know when i see you i will act just as cool and chill as always and you will have no clue i feel this way, cuz thats just the way it has to be.
zip_ty:
Wow thats pretty profound. It remindes me of the saying "its better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all."
sap:
I hope that saying is true.