I'm back.
I'd like to thank those that left me messages of condolence. Its been a tough few days, but being with the family has helped, as has seeing my Grandma settle down into her new home in Callander, Scotland.
Needless to say, I'm emotionally and physically drained now. Last Tuesday I came home from work, packed, changed and went straight back out to catch my train. My sister picked me up at 10.30....and I just slumped when I got back to hers. It was the first time I'd really been able to grieve. But we all looked at photos for an hour or so before settling down to sleep.
The next day was hectic and tough. Believe it or not, this was only the second funeral I've ever been too., and the first for a direct family member. We met the rest of the family outside the chapel of rest, but we viewed my Grandad at peace as just the 4 of us plus my sisters fiancee. It was then that I let it all out - as did the whole family. He looked at peace.....but he also wasn't the Grandad we knew....
...the tears subsided eventually, and there was then a forty minute funeral procession through all the places round Manchester he'd lived with my Grandma. We arrived at the crematorium on time and had a short but humourous service - lots of great memories, but again many tears.
After thanking the vicar for the upbeat and well read service, we left for the pub for food and a few drinks. My Gran appeared at times to be the strongest of us all, but we were all cheered up by the chat about the good times.
After my Gran was taken back to her temporary care, everyone went home.....only to proceed up to Scotland on Thursday taking my Gran to her care home. My Grandad had cared for her ever since she had a stroke 35 years ago and was paralysed on her right hand side. She needed the care, and my uncles had searched for a good home nearby their respective homes.
After a long journey, we arrived in Callander - not far from Stirling - and got her settled in just before dinnertime. She seemed to emotionally drift in and out, as she seemed a bit bewildered by everything and wasn't sure how close family would be....and after we had a Chinese meal, we all went over to my uncle's house - a 40 minute drive right down to about a mile from the shore of Loch Lomond, and although tired, we chatted until the early hours.
Friday afternoon we had a short memorial service where we buried my Grandad's ashes - which is within view of the room that my Gran will be moving into tomorrow. She won't be told this until she has settled down and the vicar has agreed to do a service after meeting her.
We took my Gran out shopping after the service and got her some new clothes. This cheered her up no end. After just getting her back in time for dinner, we all went for another meal and more drinks back at my uncles...only this time it was an early night.
Saturday was another busy day - we took my Gran out again, before setting off in the early afternoon - after we left, my uncle took her to the highland games which she thoroughly enjoyed. All the while, we were taking it steadily back down to my sister's place. By the time we got back, we were totally shattered, but had had the foresight to phone ahead to Pizza Hut to order pizza....
A relatively early night was followed by a 5 hour sleep and an early start - first dropping my parents off at the airport and then my sister dropped me off at the train station in Manchester. It was another long journey and all I did when I got back was sleep.....
I'm just glad that my Gran is settled and seems to be adapting. She'll be taken to my uncle's house this week which will reassure her that someone is just round the corner. As my Grandad had been putting money away for years, all the care home fees are paid for for a good few years - something that my Gran wasn't aware of.
It'll be expensive to visit, but I'm hoping to go up as often as I can. I think the whole family intend to meet more often now - we're all that little bit more stronger and some of the differences that had surfaced between my Dad and his brothers over the last few years have now been put aside.
I think I'm about ready for sleep now....but I'm going to sleep though work tomorrow.....
I'd like to thank those that left me messages of condolence. Its been a tough few days, but being with the family has helped, as has seeing my Grandma settle down into her new home in Callander, Scotland.
Needless to say, I'm emotionally and physically drained now. Last Tuesday I came home from work, packed, changed and went straight back out to catch my train. My sister picked me up at 10.30....and I just slumped when I got back to hers. It was the first time I'd really been able to grieve. But we all looked at photos for an hour or so before settling down to sleep.
The next day was hectic and tough. Believe it or not, this was only the second funeral I've ever been too., and the first for a direct family member. We met the rest of the family outside the chapel of rest, but we viewed my Grandad at peace as just the 4 of us plus my sisters fiancee. It was then that I let it all out - as did the whole family. He looked at peace.....but he also wasn't the Grandad we knew....
...the tears subsided eventually, and there was then a forty minute funeral procession through all the places round Manchester he'd lived with my Grandma. We arrived at the crematorium on time and had a short but humourous service - lots of great memories, but again many tears.
After thanking the vicar for the upbeat and well read service, we left for the pub for food and a few drinks. My Gran appeared at times to be the strongest of us all, but we were all cheered up by the chat about the good times.
After my Gran was taken back to her temporary care, everyone went home.....only to proceed up to Scotland on Thursday taking my Gran to her care home. My Grandad had cared for her ever since she had a stroke 35 years ago and was paralysed on her right hand side. She needed the care, and my uncles had searched for a good home nearby their respective homes.
After a long journey, we arrived in Callander - not far from Stirling - and got her settled in just before dinnertime. She seemed to emotionally drift in and out, as she seemed a bit bewildered by everything and wasn't sure how close family would be....and after we had a Chinese meal, we all went over to my uncle's house - a 40 minute drive right down to about a mile from the shore of Loch Lomond, and although tired, we chatted until the early hours.
Friday afternoon we had a short memorial service where we buried my Grandad's ashes - which is within view of the room that my Gran will be moving into tomorrow. She won't be told this until she has settled down and the vicar has agreed to do a service after meeting her.
We took my Gran out shopping after the service and got her some new clothes. This cheered her up no end. After just getting her back in time for dinner, we all went for another meal and more drinks back at my uncles...only this time it was an early night.
Saturday was another busy day - we took my Gran out again, before setting off in the early afternoon - after we left, my uncle took her to the highland games which she thoroughly enjoyed. All the while, we were taking it steadily back down to my sister's place. By the time we got back, we were totally shattered, but had had the foresight to phone ahead to Pizza Hut to order pizza....
A relatively early night was followed by a 5 hour sleep and an early start - first dropping my parents off at the airport and then my sister dropped me off at the train station in Manchester. It was another long journey and all I did when I got back was sleep.....
I'm just glad that my Gran is settled and seems to be adapting. She'll be taken to my uncle's house this week which will reassure her that someone is just round the corner. As my Grandad had been putting money away for years, all the care home fees are paid for for a good few years - something that my Gran wasn't aware of.
It'll be expensive to visit, but I'm hoping to go up as often as I can. I think the whole family intend to meet more often now - we're all that little bit more stronger and some of the differences that had surfaced between my Dad and his brothers over the last few years have now been put aside.
I think I'm about ready for sleep now....but I'm going to sleep though work tomorrow.....
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
Kisses