saltonsea

Dear Diary,
I am slowly planning my escape from sanity.....It is going well.

The peace that i was relishing, has sublimated into a seemingly distant memory. To the type of something once enjoyable, that now lingers like the high-pitched throb of an alarm clock. The feeling of an unfamiliar void, beating over and over to the tune of "where has it gone?".

I knew i could not dissipate forever. But i'm still pissed.
I'm kinna getting tired of having to pay attention to things.
Things that should not be resurfacing so frequently as issues.
People can be arseholes.....unreliable arseholes.

happy posts......i want to make some happy posts......
With rainbows, teletubbies and unicorns.

But nothing really to tell. My main activicties recently have been working on my book, and cooking.
I love writing and cooking. i wish they were my only jobs in life.
I've always wished we were still in the days where people were patrons of the arts. Where people were so passionate about arts, that they would sponsor you, so you could concentrate soley on your work, and not have to take two jobs to pay the bills.
Now it seems that i have to make a choice between doing what i love to do, and having a family. Which i hope to have someday. a day far away mind you.
A writer of poetry, short stories and plays, is not as desirable a commodity as it used to be.
and i don't want to be a cook. I like cooking, but i know i'll end up looking like Dom DeLuise.

But like i say.....fuck it. whatever happens, happens.

I'm laughing my arse off right now, cause i'm reading what i wrote so far, and it sounds like i'm a black cloud that is seeking a sugar-momma. hahaha.
Is it a bad thing to amuse yourself so much?
I'm acutally pretty cheerful these days. But who needs to vent what one is content with?

I just want to be rich enough so that i can only write and photograph, get drunk before noon, and piss on the neighbour's dog.
I shall, however, end up writing reviews on tupperware for the Wal-Mart flyer....and that is fine with me. They will be the best damn reviews wal-mart has ever seen....

I only dream in widescreen....