If you're in Portland, OR, and you want to get in a fight; head over to the Tugboat Brew Pub. Toss back a couple a pints of Cherynobl Stout (x-tra radiated), and feel the EVIL spread through your veins! Then, just stumble up Burnside and let the magic take it's course.
jumping_spider:
And if you are feeling really pissy you can try and beat on the hippie behind the bar.