Alright. I'm pissed....
...without further adieu, these are the reasons why I hate the new Suicide Girls web format:
1. It takes me forty years to load the fucking MAIN PAGE! This, my dear Missy, means that you have WAY too much going on on the main page, and dear, first impressions are the most important. do you really think anyone is going to want to buy a member ship to a site that, and in the day and age of "I wanted it yesterday and on a silver plater, thank you" days, people will actually PAY to wait!?!?!? I don't think so.
2. This looks like a high school slam* book. Or, even worse, a yearbook.
* A Slam Book: A journal which is shared amongst a group of memebers within a social group, or 'clique' where one or all members of said group confide(s) their own thoughts and feelings about peers around them. Most of the time, these "comments" and or thoughts have negative connotation.
3. As a person who is in persuit of a REAL journalist career, the fact that I am "Bloging" irritates me to no end. I know that a lot fo people think that blogging is the next wave of journalism, but I just see it as a tidal wave of opinion, casually sprkinled with the news.
4. I can't see naked girls fast enough. Basically, if it takes forty years to load the damn main page, it takes equal, if not double that amount of time for the sets to load. Also, I feel like I am staring into one of those pictograph, or wheel things that, when I was a kid amused me- as I peered in the binocular-like aparatus, clicking the side arm to change each picture- when I look at the most recent photosets.
5. My name/password is no longer saved so that all I have to do when I come home is click on the link and come right to my page. This is just another thirty years of waiting, once I have paid my dues by, god forbid, even clicking on the link in the first place.
6. Myspace is taking over SG. I didn't really WANT to pick my top five freinds, however, I was tired of the ever changing order in which I saw my freinds appear to me every time my home page would load. I felt like I was playing a dizzying game of poker with my freinds pictures.
7. The whole damn set up is just so fucking fruity. WHY the frilly cursive on everything? I think it'd be cool to simply do that for the girls names for each set, but on EVERYTHING!?!?! That's like when your aunt Sue gets into her stenciling phase and must stencil-paint Ivy running along the tops of every wall in every room. Oh yeah, and then she has mauve colored carpet installed. Actually, the girly font DOES kind of remind me of seventies porn
And, Lastly, I must be getting older because this change just plain irritates me. I mean, shit, this means I gotta readapt and fall into a NEW comfort zone, and then what? Then they are just gonna come and sweep it up from underneath my feet. And damn, while they are at it, they COULD change the menu on the home's caffeteria menu!!! (LOL, to any of you who did not get that last one, it was a self depriciating illusion to my being a cranky old retiree!).
Folks, I honestly think we are seeing the end of SG's days. I mean, I could be wrong, but my mama only raised one fool, and my brother is STILL alive, thank you very much! But seriously, it was like what people do after a really helatious divorce- they go and try to re-invent themselves. SG is doing a Madonna, or a Madge from up the street who caught her husband Sal having an affair with his secretary. After all of the bull shit that Missy and Sean had to put up with regarding the grils who left here sucking lemons, stamping feet, crying foul play, hiring lawyers, all while still taking their clothes off for OTHER cameras, they are coming to a point where they felt that perhaps, like a shedding of one's dreads, the old format held too much history. While I am still opposed to this, I understand it IS permanent, it had to happen, but that this also is a sign of the good ol SG times.
...without further adieu, these are the reasons why I hate the new Suicide Girls web format:
1. It takes me forty years to load the fucking MAIN PAGE! This, my dear Missy, means that you have WAY too much going on on the main page, and dear, first impressions are the most important. do you really think anyone is going to want to buy a member ship to a site that, and in the day and age of "I wanted it yesterday and on a silver plater, thank you" days, people will actually PAY to wait!?!?!? I don't think so.
2. This looks like a high school slam* book. Or, even worse, a yearbook.
* A Slam Book: A journal which is shared amongst a group of memebers within a social group, or 'clique' where one or all members of said group confide(s) their own thoughts and feelings about peers around them. Most of the time, these "comments" and or thoughts have negative connotation.
3. As a person who is in persuit of a REAL journalist career, the fact that I am "Bloging" irritates me to no end. I know that a lot fo people think that blogging is the next wave of journalism, but I just see it as a tidal wave of opinion, casually sprkinled with the news.
4. I can't see naked girls fast enough. Basically, if it takes forty years to load the damn main page, it takes equal, if not double that amount of time for the sets to load. Also, I feel like I am staring into one of those pictograph, or wheel things that, when I was a kid amused me- as I peered in the binocular-like aparatus, clicking the side arm to change each picture- when I look at the most recent photosets.
5. My name/password is no longer saved so that all I have to do when I come home is click on the link and come right to my page. This is just another thirty years of waiting, once I have paid my dues by, god forbid, even clicking on the link in the first place.
6. Myspace is taking over SG. I didn't really WANT to pick my top five freinds, however, I was tired of the ever changing order in which I saw my freinds appear to me every time my home page would load. I felt like I was playing a dizzying game of poker with my freinds pictures.
7. The whole damn set up is just so fucking fruity. WHY the frilly cursive on everything? I think it'd be cool to simply do that for the girls names for each set, but on EVERYTHING!?!?! That's like when your aunt Sue gets into her stenciling phase and must stencil-paint Ivy running along the tops of every wall in every room. Oh yeah, and then she has mauve colored carpet installed.
Actually, the girly font DOES kind of remind me of seventies porn
And, Lastly, I must be getting older because this change just plain irritates me. I mean, shit, this means I gotta readapt and fall into a NEW comfort zone, and then what? Then they are just gonna come and sweep it up from underneath my feet. And damn, while they are at it, they COULD change the menu on the home's caffeteria menu!!! (LOL, to any of you who did not get that last one, it was a self depriciating illusion to my being a cranky old retiree!).
Folks, I honestly think we are seeing the end of SG's days. I mean, I could be wrong, but my mama only raised one fool, and my brother is STILL alive, thank you very much! But seriously, it was like what people do after a really helatious divorce- they go and try to re-invent themselves. SG is doing a Madonna, or a Madge from up the street who caught her husband Sal having an affair with his secretary. After all of the bull shit that Missy and Sean had to put up with regarding the grils who left here sucking lemons, stamping feet, crying foul play, hiring lawyers, all while still taking their clothes off for OTHER cameras, they are coming to a point where they felt that perhaps, like a shedding of one's dreads, the old format held too much history. While I am still opposed to this, I understand it IS permanent, it had to happen, but that this also is a sign of the good ol SG times.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
hera:
Yes I am on thier cover. Thanks for the compliments! Its much appreciated love 
brocklee:
FUCKIN A MAN!!!....RIGHT ON THE BUTTON!!