First off I would like to preface this rant with saying that my parents are not bad people.
If you ever meet my family you the question may pop in your head..."How did Christie comes from these people?" This is not to say that I am better than them in anyway. But we are very different. My parents are failing right now. Failing at their marriage, finances, and pretty much life. My brother is in the same boat. And that boat is slowly sinking. The frustrating part of all this is that they don't seem to care that it's sinking. I know the saying ignorance is bliss..I'm beginning to think that denial is also in that same category. I have tried to help them on several occasions and it has been met with anger, resentment and frustration from them. So, I have pretty much given up on helping and have had to pull myself away from them and see that they aren't going to make positive changes so the best I can do at this point is just stay out of it. That's not to say that I'm not a shoulder to cry on. Each one will call me throughout the month and complain about the other. Each one being the "good guy" in the equation (of course) and I will listen. But that's all there is left to do.
September is looking pretty busy and it's not even August yet. My mom is flying down here a few days before my dad (and possibly brother) drive down to stay with us for about a week. They are coming to see the new baby. I say, "possibly brother" because my brother informed me that he was told he had to stay home and watch the family dogs. I would rather that job goes to a family friend. It would be nice to have my whole fucked up family here together. Then my dad informs me that it's not just to feed the dogs but also because their fence that they share with their neighbor is coming down and the dogs are getting into eachother's yard. Why this can't be resolved in the entire Month of August that separates the now and then when they visit is beyond me. This may not seem like a big deal to anyone reading this and in actuality it's probably not but it frustrates the hell out of me.
My family doesn't respect each other at all. I wouldn't say they don't love each other but they certainly aren't getting along as they used to when I was a kid. It's hard to imagine my mom without my dad and vise versa. My brother is 28 going on 18. My dad makes jokes about "offing" my mom to his friends over lunch. My mom's ability to play victim in every situation makes her both pathetic and annoying. This is the never-ending circle of crap that happens in my parents' house 24/7. They don't take care of anything they own so everything is constantly in a state of broken or on the verge of breaking and it isn't a priority. Their house is dirty all the time. No one feels it's their job to clean up. And when someone does clean up it is used as fodder against each other. The nitpicking and bickering is the only way of communication they seem to have with each other anymore.
This all puts me in a horrific mood. I spend most of yesterday cleaning up my house. This morning I got up and did more cleaning. I can't stand the idea that I could be turning into them...even if that means I left my cereal bowl in the sink overnight.
If you ever meet my family you the question may pop in your head..."How did Christie comes from these people?" This is not to say that I am better than them in anyway. But we are very different. My parents are failing right now. Failing at their marriage, finances, and pretty much life. My brother is in the same boat. And that boat is slowly sinking. The frustrating part of all this is that they don't seem to care that it's sinking. I know the saying ignorance is bliss..I'm beginning to think that denial is also in that same category. I have tried to help them on several occasions and it has been met with anger, resentment and frustration from them. So, I have pretty much given up on helping and have had to pull myself away from them and see that they aren't going to make positive changes so the best I can do at this point is just stay out of it. That's not to say that I'm not a shoulder to cry on. Each one will call me throughout the month and complain about the other. Each one being the "good guy" in the equation (of course) and I will listen. But that's all there is left to do.
September is looking pretty busy and it's not even August yet. My mom is flying down here a few days before my dad (and possibly brother) drive down to stay with us for about a week. They are coming to see the new baby. I say, "possibly brother" because my brother informed me that he was told he had to stay home and watch the family dogs. I would rather that job goes to a family friend. It would be nice to have my whole fucked up family here together. Then my dad informs me that it's not just to feed the dogs but also because their fence that they share with their neighbor is coming down and the dogs are getting into eachother's yard. Why this can't be resolved in the entire Month of August that separates the now and then when they visit is beyond me. This may not seem like a big deal to anyone reading this and in actuality it's probably not but it frustrates the hell out of me.
My family doesn't respect each other at all. I wouldn't say they don't love each other but they certainly aren't getting along as they used to when I was a kid. It's hard to imagine my mom without my dad and vise versa. My brother is 28 going on 18. My dad makes jokes about "offing" my mom to his friends over lunch. My mom's ability to play victim in every situation makes her both pathetic and annoying. This is the never-ending circle of crap that happens in my parents' house 24/7. They don't take care of anything they own so everything is constantly in a state of broken or on the verge of breaking and it isn't a priority. Their house is dirty all the time. No one feels it's their job to clean up. And when someone does clean up it is used as fodder against each other. The nitpicking and bickering is the only way of communication they seem to have with each other anymore.
This all puts me in a horrific mood. I spend most of yesterday cleaning up my house. This morning I got up and did more cleaning. I can't stand the idea that I could be turning into them...even if that means I left my cereal bowl in the sink overnight.
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You will NOT be your parents honey. You have already learned from them and their history so you will not repeat it. Just think of that fear as what will remind you not to do the things they do that put them on that path to begin with. You have a husband who loves and supports you. You have one brilliant son and another on the way. You have a group of friends who would do anything for you.