I'm having some sort of fucking break down. I hate this fucking world and the people in it. No one gives a damn about anyone else. I'm so fucking tired of being beat down and walked all over at both jobs, with no one fucking caring. What the fuck happened to this world?! Overworked, underappreciated and turning so fucking jaded and cynical. Something I swore would never happen to me. But FUCK. Why should I even bother? Nothing fucking matters in a world that is run by and overrun with people who ONLY care about themselves.
And no one's going to read this, because I'm just some fucking internet porn model/stripper who isn't supposed to whine and cry and bitch and complain. People want to read about my adventures in the world all suger coated bubble gum because it's all fantasy, right? So why even bother. Because I literally have NO ONE to talk to, no one to go to when the shit that is my life hits the fan. But if I don't get it out I'll fucking explode. And my eyes are tired and sore.
God DAMN it.
And no one's going to read this, because I'm just some fucking internet porn model/stripper who isn't supposed to whine and cry and bitch and complain. People want to read about my adventures in the world all suger coated bubble gum because it's all fantasy, right? So why even bother. Because I literally have NO ONE to talk to, no one to go to when the shit that is my life hits the fan. But if I don't get it out I'll fucking explode. And my eyes are tired and sore.
God DAMN it.
VIEW 27 of 27 COMMENTS
nightbrightener:
this is probably the sort of trite sugar coated bullshit that has you pissed; but people do care and for what it's worth, self worth is always a question of perspective. and having people who only saw one second of your life really car about you and offer to be there for you is not something to be downplayed. yeah the fact that you are atractive and pose naked isn't gonna hurt when it comes to winning guys/girls sympathies. but come on, i think you can tell by the quality of the posts that people are willing to be there for you and no matter what. not because of your tits and ass but because of the sincerity and need in that post. because of the person they see in and past the photos. YOU ARE NEVER ALONE. it may be a kind word from an older waitress at a diner or a sincere compliment from a stranger at a store, or christ a smile from a fucking kid on the street, but people do care. the trick is finding the ones you click with and i know that's not easy but they are out there and there will be a group of people you will gather to you who make you feel loved, completed, and desired in every way. you have to fight sometimes to see the good in humans because we are a flawed fucking species but don't ever doubt that there is love and respect and kindness in this world, sometimes it's just apreciating that it comes from people who always have their own problems and agenda's and aren't the selfless soul mates we all sometimes desire. i know you've had more than a few offers of an ear if you want to talk so i won't add to the list. but from the bottom of my fucking heart, things do get better and the passion and joy you will feel when they do will make this seem like some pale b movie horror flick. best wishes and my kindest thoughts. hugs and kittens and cupcakes and sunshine and late night giggles and all the things that make you smile. you deserve them
korvus:
It's been forever since I've seen you, but I still do care about you. I have unlimited long distance, so if you ever want to talk, let me know. Or maybe I need to fly out there and make you some baked ziti? Anyway, let me know if there is anything I can do for ya. Take care!