omg another one.
i just had some thoughts and since i dont have written word diaries anymore that i dont just cover up after a few days with pictures, i thought... well, i thought id like to maybe see them in a few days, because i seem to be systematically erasing all presence of a life before last week.
anyway ive just been sitting around thinking a lot, and thinking leads to discovery which often leads to change. sometimes its a change in atmosphere, sometimes its a change in behavior. sometimes an old friend will call me, somebody i havent spoken to in quite a while and ill remember all of the people that i lost touch with. ill go through my phone and call all the people that deserve calling, all of the friendships that i might have had at a given time that for whatever reason became inconvenient.
so i call them, and i renew my cards, and i keep up with my people. i mean its like you dont really feel like you have people until you realize that they will come through for you when you need them. that's the other side to this thought... about human social organization.
human behavior is a peculiar thing, the way we socialize. some would argue that the group dominates but the longer i live the more i find that people are just atoms bouncing around completely helplessly, and you hold on to what you can. its not like anybody is powerful, we are all as afraid as the next guy about our futures. there may be a bunch of people that think theyve formed some kind of allegiance, but in the end we go alone.
its not morbid, its just a reality. there is no larger society that locks us into roles, it is simply the lowest common demoninator. its a helpful tool for those who wish to walk easily through life and nothing more. one can live beyond the limits of society if one really wants to. all peoples are capable of overcoming whatever restrictions are made of them, just look at history, just look at speciation. its all the same, thats what you have to remember. if you just continue what you are doing, things will continue. you can count on that.
mostly what i find is that in the end i look back and i say that wasnt so bad. you think its the worst thing that could possibly ever happen when its happening to you, and then you come to your senses and realize that its just a small part of a larger life. just people floating around and shit.
so thats what i think about that.
i just had some thoughts and since i dont have written word diaries anymore that i dont just cover up after a few days with pictures, i thought... well, i thought id like to maybe see them in a few days, because i seem to be systematically erasing all presence of a life before last week.
anyway ive just been sitting around thinking a lot, and thinking leads to discovery which often leads to change. sometimes its a change in atmosphere, sometimes its a change in behavior. sometimes an old friend will call me, somebody i havent spoken to in quite a while and ill remember all of the people that i lost touch with. ill go through my phone and call all the people that deserve calling, all of the friendships that i might have had at a given time that for whatever reason became inconvenient.
so i call them, and i renew my cards, and i keep up with my people. i mean its like you dont really feel like you have people until you realize that they will come through for you when you need them. that's the other side to this thought... about human social organization.
human behavior is a peculiar thing, the way we socialize. some would argue that the group dominates but the longer i live the more i find that people are just atoms bouncing around completely helplessly, and you hold on to what you can. its not like anybody is powerful, we are all as afraid as the next guy about our futures. there may be a bunch of people that think theyve formed some kind of allegiance, but in the end we go alone.
its not morbid, its just a reality. there is no larger society that locks us into roles, it is simply the lowest common demoninator. its a helpful tool for those who wish to walk easily through life and nothing more. one can live beyond the limits of society if one really wants to. all peoples are capable of overcoming whatever restrictions are made of them, just look at history, just look at speciation. its all the same, thats what you have to remember. if you just continue what you are doing, things will continue. you can count on that.
mostly what i find is that in the end i look back and i say that wasnt so bad. you think its the worst thing that could possibly ever happen when its happening to you, and then you come to your senses and realize that its just a small part of a larger life. just people floating around and shit.
so thats what i think about that.
and i agree with you