In court today over custody of my twins. What a nightmare. A little backstory to those of you that are new friends. On xmas eve 3yrs ago my husband of 11yrs told me he didnt want to be married, should never have gotten married, didnt love me, was having an affair, & was a sex addict. Not long after, he left me to raise our 1yr old twins alone without a penny in the bank, just flat out left, see ya later, screw you. It has been very important to me that he be an active part of their lives. I have gotten passed this & have moved on, yet he insists I have not. he's extremely narcisistic & egomaniacal not to mention that he is a sociopath as well.
we are now in the stages of who has custody. Considering I've been the one who has raised them their entire lives without as much as a package of diapers from him, there shouldn't be a question as to who has sole custody. I'm offering more than fair visitation, overnight weekends, split holidays, my only stipulation is I have final say in major decisions. well this did not sit well with him or his arrogant attorney. They are now trying to say I have mental problems & am jealous of he & his fiance. I didn't even know he had a girlfriend (I suspected but wasnt sure. Ive actually met her & think shes a nice girl) let alone a fiance but it seems I am jealous of her. They really haven't a leg to stand on. So now they have 2 weeks to agree to my "offer" or the court will appoint legal guardians for my children, they will be questioned (they're 3yrs old), they will come to my home evaluate me & make a decision. As a parent who has their childs best interests at heart I cannot understand how he would subject them to this. I tried to reason with him at the courthouse & he walked away without a word. Who seems bitter & jealous? This is not about his children, this is about his pride. It's all about him as it always has been & will be. It's very sad.
Needless to say I'm very upset about being depicted as an emotionally unstable person, which is as far from the truth as you can get. I have been in therapy for 2yrs dealing with all he has done to me. I've made great strides. I do take mediction, but nowdays who doesn't. I honestly care nothing about this man, I have someone in my life who makes me very happy. If he is getting married again I wish them the best, I hold no grudges. But why must he put my children through this. It's very disturbing. My children are sweet, smart, healthy, & happy little individuals. They know the alphabet, can count to 40, know the planets, continents & US states. They are nurtured & loved in my home. They are musically & artisticly inclined & I encourage that to the fullest. We read together, sing songs, go to a play group. Do I seem to be unfit to any of you? I just want this to be over. I want a normal life for them & for me. So now I'll play the waiting game for the next 2 weeks to see what he has decided to do. I really hope he stops being selfish for once in his life & thinks of the welfare & best interests of these children.
we are now in the stages of who has custody. Considering I've been the one who has raised them their entire lives without as much as a package of diapers from him, there shouldn't be a question as to who has sole custody. I'm offering more than fair visitation, overnight weekends, split holidays, my only stipulation is I have final say in major decisions. well this did not sit well with him or his arrogant attorney. They are now trying to say I have mental problems & am jealous of he & his fiance. I didn't even know he had a girlfriend (I suspected but wasnt sure. Ive actually met her & think shes a nice girl) let alone a fiance but it seems I am jealous of her. They really haven't a leg to stand on. So now they have 2 weeks to agree to my "offer" or the court will appoint legal guardians for my children, they will be questioned (they're 3yrs old), they will come to my home evaluate me & make a decision. As a parent who has their childs best interests at heart I cannot understand how he would subject them to this. I tried to reason with him at the courthouse & he walked away without a word. Who seems bitter & jealous? This is not about his children, this is about his pride. It's all about him as it always has been & will be. It's very sad.
Needless to say I'm very upset about being depicted as an emotionally unstable person, which is as far from the truth as you can get. I have been in therapy for 2yrs dealing with all he has done to me. I've made great strides. I do take mediction, but nowdays who doesn't. I honestly care nothing about this man, I have someone in my life who makes me very happy. If he is getting married again I wish them the best, I hold no grudges. But why must he put my children through this. It's very disturbing. My children are sweet, smart, healthy, & happy little individuals. They know the alphabet, can count to 40, know the planets, continents & US states. They are nurtured & loved in my home. They are musically & artisticly inclined & I encourage that to the fullest. We read together, sing songs, go to a play group. Do I seem to be unfit to any of you? I just want this to be over. I want a normal life for them & for me. So now I'll play the waiting game for the next 2 weeks to see what he has decided to do. I really hope he stops being selfish for once in his life & thinks of the welfare & best interests of these children.
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No hangover this morning though so I'm greatly relieved!