rosieblue

But as we got older there was undeniably something else there. That little back ground noise that you try to silence, knowing it's better not to be heard, let alone acted on. And so we moved on - he got a place with his girlfriend and I was busy planning my wedding. Until we reached the simultaneous stage of things falling apart and wanting a familiar hand to hold. And for whatever reason, that quiet voice was no longer heard as we started to talk more openly - how attractive we found one another, how we knew it wasn't a good idea, how the thought of things was fun to toy with nonetheless.

And then things got more regular, more frank. We talked of meeting up - of how I'd yet to meet his kid, of how a catch up was due, of how much he wanted to fuck me. By this point I had my own place and was single, but he wasn't and I knew this, and pointed out that however tempting, there's better ways of dealing with an unhappy relationship than cheating. And he knew I was right. A week or so later, something got the better of me. I text him saying 'When are you free? I don't want to be sensible any more'. And we started making plans - I had everything we'd need for a good night, and yes, he could finally see my boobs. After some clashing plans things finally worked out last week. He called me Friday night 'Are you alone? I'm going to get a taxi up to you'.

I rushed around - I needed more beer in (I was going to need a beer or two in me to avoid being up tight), the place was a mess, I needed to change, I wasn't expecting this! By the time I got back from the shop, he was there, and I frantically tried to tidy and he told me not to, he wasn't here for the flat, he didn't care about the mess, especially given the mess I've seen him in, but I cared all the same. We spent a couple of hours talking. About what's new - what's wrong with his relationship, how the family is doing, the trouble of finding freelance work, and 'the good old days'. It was nice to see the man he's become (cheating aside). I showed him some of my modelling work, 'you have a really nice body', felt a little awkward. I knew he hadn't really come round for a catch up, but I couldn't shake it. Eventually, looking through some old school photos, he turned to me and said 'you can come sit next to me, you know' and I did. Still babbling on about everyone from the days of yonder, and he started kissing my neck.

I'm such a sucker for being kissed from behind, and it stopped me in my tracks. Within a minute the photos were gone and I was lost in the kisses tracing my neck, his arms pulling me closer, his hands hunting out my breasts, gripping his thighs. I quickly stood up and led him to the bedroom. And I was so surprised - by everything. How natural it was, how much better his body was than I expected, the way he moved me, his kisses, and his very glorious cock. The second he was inside me it was ecstatic. And it wasn't a fuck. We stayed close, moving together, wrapping ourselves around one another, like we just couldn't get enough. And my god it was good - you know like if someone's been teasing you all day and you finally get what you want? Completely unrestrained, completely passionate, and I lost myself. Until it was over and we each lay there, out of breath and smiling into oblivion.

He couldn't stay - he had a girlfriend to get home to any way and a kid to get ready to see. But I didn't feel used for having him leave so quickly. As he kissed me goodbye with promises that 'we're definitely doing this again' I saw him off and returned to bed utterly content. And not just because I'd finally had the GOOD shag I was after. Something just felt right. I know nothing about it was - don't preach to me. I know the first hand that having sex with a friend can end terribly. But I don't quite know how to explain it - I guess it's like comparing the experience of a one night stand to that of a long term relationship. The one-off may be exciting and good, but a long term partner knows you. There,s a connection there beyond the physical, they know what buttons to press, how to behave afterwards, how to make the sex match your mood. And that's how it was. Not so much friends fumbling along, but someone who knows you entirely, goes into things selflessly and takes things as a natural extension of what was already there. I loved it.

And from then on, we've been playing a game of sorts. Or rather cleverly working our way around the boundaries that we face. We didn't talk all weekend - I knew he was with his family, but not if his girlfriend was around and so didn't want to risk it, and I was out with friends. But instead waited until Monday, when I knew he'd be alone at work, to see if he was free in the week for a little going away present before I go on holiday. He text asking about the photos I'd posted from the weekend, of how his imagination was running wild. And despite my mind shouting at me 'don't do it again, you'll be lucky to get away with it once', I couldn't stop myself. Even after the note I wasn't put off.

B - You alright? Who's that in your picture?
Me - I'm good thanks, it's a friend from SG, I'm still recovering!
B - Thought so, you two look very sexy together, had my imagination running wild!
Me - Oh, well glad to hear my outfit did its job.
B - It did ;-)
Me - Well maybe I can see about getting things clean before I next see you do you can dirty me up again. Though I warn you, I've been a terribly bad girl.
B - That sounds good to me! Now, what have you done?
Me - I simply refuse to do what I'm told. I've been known to try biting my way out of situations with young men.
B - I'll make you do what you're told, I'll use force if I have to!
Me - Well then I'll have the rope at the ready incase I'm feeling extra naughty.
B - that's fine with me but I will be tying you up, not the other way round I'm afraid.
Me - I'm sure I'll survive
B - Good, so how naughty can you be/ have been/ would like to be.
Me - Oh very, I've been known to end up on the receiving end of a belt. Amongst other things.
B - Nice, threesomes?
Me - done it.
B - Again?
Me - depending on the company
B - would you prefer 2 girls and a guy (me) or just you and two boys?

Ok - so I know I'm encouraging things. Massively. And it's really, really not what I should be doing, but I can't stop myself from getting carried away with him. And the more it goes on, the harder I find it to stop. Someone with whom I have such a great connection, and we can talk like this - he wants to explore just what I want. And the bonus of all bonuses - he is not only up for, but suggested a MMF! Do you know how rare that is?! I've done FFM, and would happily do so again, but I've always wanted to try a MMF, and whilst it's easy to coax a guy into bed with two girls, suggesting an extra penis in the mix doesn't go down quite as well. And as is key with such things - I can trust B, completely. Just need to find a third party. And it shows he's not selfish, my enjoyment is just as important as his, another essential in my books.

Oh deary me, what am I doing?! I feel this is going to get complicated. And soon.

Oh spoke to him earllier this week, he said he's moved out, but didn't go into any more detail. Probably not a good sign though. We were meant to meet yesterday, but didn't. Here's hoping.