rorschach

Me

I've been slowly sliding down from the emotional high of meeting my goddess Vivid and the other hot SGs at Club Suicide (damn that Milloux and her plaid miniskirt!) and that's pretty natural. Viv is pretty amazing you know!

The last few months, I've been trying to do my own thing and forget the stuff that's happened the last year and a half. I found someone and...well I don't want to get too personal but I'm missing a certain someone terribly. And missing this person who is new-er in my life is causing me to think about and miss the person who is no longer in my life.
I'm not sure why I was born with a heart if all it does is hurt most of the time but *sigh*.

I have to work today...I couldn't get the day off because it was my manager's decision to make disapproving today's day off request as the trade-off for giving me other days off earlier for an event. Naturally I'm a bit bitter because if we work so hard and earn days off, what's the point if we can't take them off when we need them? And also, we have more staff in our team than ever, yet this is the first time in the history of our department that people have had days off not approved.

So no aquarium trip this year...no Sea World...it's fine though since I don't have anyone to take anyways. Instead I'll try to get to work as early as possible, get off as early as possible, trudge my way through rush hour traffic to get to Amoeba Records and then treat myself to dinner and a movie at the Arclight. I'm thinking of seeing "The Help." Hopefully I find something badass there at Amoeba and then treat myself to a tub of their insane caramel corn.

I'm pretty much solo since I don't want anyone to have to put up with me when I'm in a cheer-myself-up mood and with only half a day to do it (it usually takes a whole day). Plus my mom just flew out yesterday on vacation.


...

Then comes NYC, Big 4, in a couple of weeks. I'm a bit somber for that, hoping that I get to meet my friend out there and hoping nothing goes wrong during the concert.


When I get back from the show I'm going to do a major, major re-working of my SG Friends List. At first I was going to totally purge my list down to like the 15 people I talk to. It's really awesome that I have more than 8 friends so that I really can't even use that Top 8 feature...it's a good problem to have.

The reason why I've purged so much in the past is that I consider my "friends" to be people I actually converse with here on SG, with a few exceptions such as RL friends or people I talk to on other sites like Facebook. So I use the Friends Blogs feed feature on SG a lot...it's pretty much the thing I click on the most so I don't miss anyone's updates. But when there are a ton of journals on there and people doing large photodumps and they crowd out my real friends blogs, it's a pain in the ass.

Well I realized the feature has controls to show Friends and/or people you've bookmarked. I've bookmarked people in the past who I've met and wanted to get to know as friends like Haydin. Right now my feed shows both. I think I'm going to bookmark my "real" SG friends and then only look at those flagged thusly and now I can conveniently skip other people's blogs without unfriending them!




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Exxxotica LA


So this weekend I was, as I mentioned earlier, sliding...I was like trying to hide under the covers when I got a call around 2PM from my friend James.
Long story short, I totally forgot it was Exxxotica LA and we were off to the races!

I went on Saturday in a daze and forgot my camera. I saw Jenna Haze there, Joanna Angel and saw booths for others...saw Lexi Belle too. I just wandered around a bit with some peeps and I made a mental list of all of the places I wanted to stop at for tomorrow, with camera.
James was able to get a copy the new AVN magazine with Jenna, from "that" shoot. And he gave it to me, yay!



So Sunday rolled around and I was fully prepped. I knew already that there was a good chance that the stars who were there on Saturday would not be there on Sunday. Welp, neither Jenna was there nor Joanna but it's cool as I know we'll be shooting them again soon.

Just about everyone else was there (missed Adrenalynn though, she didn't make it out this time), so that was cool. Sunday was so empty that I was able to chat up quite a few of my fave girls and that yielded various results, haha.

Keep in mind, there were a lot of performers/stars there...I only took pics of the girls I liked and even some of those I didn't put in this blog as they either didn't turn out to be what I liked or I didn't want to mention them and the nature of our conversations...like one girl hammered me for wearing a SG shirt, lol.


Bobbi Starr

My first stop was Bobbi, who I thought was retired but was looking simply adorable! Flat, glossy black hair with bangs, like Bettie Page, I simply can't resist. Don't be fooled by her clean, fresh look though, this girl is very, very dirty and always seems to love getting roles in the rough stuff along with the fetish...and she loves to be on the receiving end... She was fun to chat with a bit!


Rubberdoll

I met her last year and she was the postergirl for nearly all con advertising! I got some DVDs last year and picked one up this year too. Her POV Domme DVD is just way too hot! Yet another vehicle for me getting more and more into the fetish/BDSM scene.


Sunny Leone

So I got to chat with Sunny who normally is not chatty at all. Why? Because my pal James is the one who "discovered" her and shot her for Penthouse way back when...and that centerfold won Pet Of The Year that year. As you can see, she's getting a bit round in the middle. She used to be very slender and statuesque. And that figure is just turning me on There's a really nice, outgoing and IMO pretty girl at work who also is Indian and voluptuous/curvy...evidently I'm a sucker for this but I've only ever met two Indian girls like this. One's Sunny.


Allie Haze

I am a HUGE fan of this girl due to one intense scene she shot when she was new...Jake Malone's Fuck Slaves 5 from Evil Angel. I wound up buying like 8 DVDs off of her and she signed every one, gave me two free 8x10s, a hug and posed for this shot for me. It was real fun talking to her and to see that she's doing really well and looking real good. She is the total girl next door who, on a full moon on Hallowe'en or something, turns into a total slut.
I also bought a Lexi Belle DVD off of her that she, Allie, was also in so that I could get Lexi to sign it for me...poor Lexi brought nothing to sell and still showed up all of the days. Oh, and Allie, she was dressed up as Princess Leia on Saturday, lol.


Random gogo dancers...my pal James stopped for every Asian girl...here are a couple.


He liked the top one the most...probably the cage, sik fukr, lol...I liked the bottom one the most...no doubt cuz I like em on the bottom *snicker*.
They were pretty hot though. But I still prefer my girls at Club Suicide. <3


Kaylani Lei

Had fun chatting up Kaylani, who I met a long time ago before she did her first porn, a year before she signed with Wicked. We talked about her old pooch, a toy doberman named "Pucha" who already passed away. Funny conversation, talking about her current pets and past ones, lol.


Lexi Belle

So I actually had two shots but liked this one better. She's so adorable! I wound up asking her like some really deep and somewhat embarrassing questions (if we're close, you can send me a message and I'll tell you...it's juicy!) for like 10 min. Then she still posed for me...while there sitting on a Sunday with almost no people...what...a...trooper. <3


Stoya

Picked up a few DVDs from her as I have nothing with her in it. She was NOTHING like I expected and we had a long fun conversation, a lot of it about how she ISN'T the goth babe everyone thinks she is...which ended with us getting into a weird fight about how good/not good Lithium_Picnic is, lol. Evidently she likes him. Me, I think he was an important part to early SG but is not in the same league as people like Suze Randall, J. Stephen Hicks, Earl Miller and Jay Allan.
It's not a diss as she took it...it's like Jorge Posada is no Mickey Mantle, if you know what I mean but Posada is a good player and a good Yankee (if you like the Yankees).
Ironically, next time I meet her somewhere, I'll have something to talk to her about and she'll probably remember me, lol. Oh and she gave me a big, signed poster too and she rolled it with a lot of care as well.


Belladonna





I had an awesome conversation with Belladonna where each time I would say something, her eyes would get bigger, lol. I've met her many times in RL settings, even before she was big in the adult industry. Chatting with her and just hanging out for a bit was simply wonderful. She really gave her time and attention to her fans at the show and she even had this crazy booth get-up where it's made to look like a circus.

Some Belladonna aerial scarf trapeze fun!





Overall it was a lot of fun and I picked up a lot of DVDs from some of my fave stars. Belladonna though...damn, she is a superstar and she made me feel like a million bucks basking in her glow...under her black wings if you will. James and I left the show just feeling her thing, if you know what I mean.

One of these times, if/when I have a special SG girl as a guest who digs the ladies as much as I do...I'd love to take her and see the sparks fly! A lot of the performers really open up when they have a pretty girl as a fan!


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Photo SG


For the last four months I've been trying to distract myself going to all of these awesome events and either taking (treating) or meeting special someone/s. And I've been trying to decide what to do with myself until next summer after the ride is over this summer. The last event is NYC. I had a choice of the following: playing MTG competitively again or working on photography to shoot for SG and upping my guitar playing time and get to the next level or picking up World Of Warcraft again.
Why is it in those pairs? I figure I have the time to do two things and I paired the two expensive hobbies vs. the cheap but time-consuming hobbies, choosing one of each as I only have the money and time budgets for thus. I've decided to go the photography route and the guitar route. Art over geek.

So what that means for me on SG is that I'm going to be putting myself out there on SG, slowly at first, while training myself up.

Now, a little about me and my photog skills...

I've trained under my friend James (nee Jay Allan) and under the studio he came from, J. Stephen Hicks studio, off and on for about 20 years in a very casual fashion. I've been on about 30 shoots of various types and edited many, many sets. What that probably means is that I'm at least as qualified if not more so than maybe 90% of the people who submit shots to SG or shoot for them.
But...that's not really up to my own standard as I've always edited the sets of guys who are elite like Mr. Hicks and Mr. Allan. So I'd like to train myself up along with gear myself up to a level where I'm getting halfway to them but am easily as good as that top 1% of SG-submitting photogs.

I figure the thing will take at least a year and I'm hoping by the end of next summer, I have my first set to submit. I really need to practice behind a digital camera more. To give you guys an idea of where I'm at, most of my experience is on sets where we're shooting with slide film. Yes, I said slide film.
On the other hand, my editing skills come pretty naturally and that's something I've become decently acceptable at by my own standard. And, I feel my ideas for sets are really good and having been a member of SG for about 7 years, I believe I get the SG-vibe thing. I figure with a lot of practice, some really good ideas, a lot of overshooting and the right SG model, I can do this and achieve the level I want.
I already have the model in mind...she's one of the most accomplished ones in the history of SG, as a model both here and elsewhere. And once that's done, maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to fly out some of my many hot friends here on SG for some really bad ass shoots and some priceless times! (And perhaps be fully ready shoot a very special certain someone...)

I'll have some amazing technical consultants on hand in my close friend Jeff who owns a lot of great equipment and knows how to use all of it, and naturally my mentor Jay Allan. Plus amongst my inner circle of friends we have a costume maker and a prop builder, both of whom are of the top-notch Hollywood level. One of these days, if they can give me some pics of their stuff that isn't held to some level of contractual secrecy and I'll blogpost them.

...and I already have a big set idea! But first I'll need to find a Shelby GT500, lol.

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Don't forget to love my girls!

This for Elliott's set <3
Elliott - Slicked





This for _Eon's set <3
_Eon - Panda





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Mantis 3x
As a closer, I love looking around the garden area of the complex where I work.
It helps me forget stuff when I need to by letting me distracting myself while looking at all of the leaves for "wildlife." My favorite thing to find is usually praying mantises but usually I see one every few months...
Well today I saw three! Lucky day?



This humongous, gorgeous green one, probably a female.



Then this really cool looking beige guy.



And then this menacing looking black and brown one...pretty interesting how they all look so different.



That's all for now and thank you to all my friends who have read this far...I pretty much live to talk to you here.

- R
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Post b-day update

Every b-day starts the same for me, it's just a lead-up full of dread. I've noticed I have a lot of sisters and brothers, especially sisters, who also have the same problem so I don't want to talk like "woe is me." I just have this sort of commitment to my blog to keep it real, let the awesome times be there and the bad times too...so you know this whole thing isn't all some sort of performance!

Side note: <3 Rlei

I got a gift from a special person on here and that was very, very nice. (Am I the first non-staff guy on this site to ever get a Wishlist gift? I'm probably the only guy who would post a link in the first place, lol.)

Anyways, more details (pics) on this and other stuff on the next blog, the one right before Big 4.

Overall the day of was somber at best. Getting up super early, working all day and then rushing home to check blogs and messages. THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO REMEMBERED OR AT LEAST SAW THAT IT WAS MY B-DAY AND SENT WISHES; IT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. I also found a couple of awesome items at Amoeba including a 24K gold disc of Nirvana - Nevermind and also this insane box set, limited to 5000, of Metallica...every old LP and record single. Pretty nuts. I also saw this really good and very SG-ish movie, Circumstance, about two young and hot Iranian girls/lovers and their struggles in the highly religious system there.

Then after that, I got sick and have been sick for a couple of days...both due to environment and mood. So it took a few days to recover and here I am, catching up on FB and SG messages. Good to be back. And I have a quandary to resolve now.

- R
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