rope176010

So anyway I walk into this cave and the first thing you see is a neon sign for osamamart. I needed a few things so I decided to check it out. Why are all freakin’ anarchists closet capitalists? It would have cost me the equivalent of $10 usd to get my osama card so I could shop. Luckily I had my refrigerated goatskin on me newly topped off before left. I was able to get a card for 1 sv (my own currency – shot of vodka.) Not only does vodka appreciate over time, it’s also appreciated all the time. So anyway first thing I see is a prayer mat with osama’s face silkscreened on it. Scarfed that right up. Needed a prayer mat anyway and it looked like he was kissing my ass while I prayed. In the pre taliban days, kite fighting was a big deal in afghanistan. Well looks like it’s coming back. They have tons of kites, but more importantly, glass impregnated kite string. They use it to cut the other kite’s string. I skipped over the kite, but I picked up two rolls of string and stuffed them in my shopping bag. I figured it would make a nice gift for my girl echo. She’ll look beautiful in it.

Get this, they have fake beards! Turns out the women really don’t get into that scratchy feel so most of the men wear fake beards, really good fakes, but fakes none the less. Of course I had to buy one so I could blend in. Let’s see, so far I had 1 prayer mat, 2 rolls of glass string and a fake beard. I was heading up to the check out – aisle 5 is open with no wait – when I see the ultimate souvenir – an osama bobble head doll. Gotta have one of those. So the whole deal cost me another 1 sv and I rewarded myself for being such a good shopper with 2 sv. Gotta run, there calling out for the afternoon prayer. Need to hurry so I can get a good spot to unroll my osama mat. ………………