rockabillyangel

I havent had a bad day, in terms of my depression and anxiety, in a lil while, but today totally is one. Part of it I think is Ive had to go off my birth control b/c ur suppost to a month before the surgery Im having. And I went off of it during my period earlier this week, and also went off of it the day I had to have a biopsy on my cervix (feels like your getting your cervix peirced) and had to have my cervix scraped (feels not too good either) by my Gyno. So I dunno if its all that happening at once or what.....but I wasnt good today.

I even started crying while driving today, and pulled over to the side of the road. The one person that I knew would make me feel better is my boyfriend, but he didnt call me yesterday and hasnt called me today and so I didnt want to bother him, incase he didnt feel like talking to me.....Im weird. But anyways, I called up my friend Tiffany in Orange County and blabberd to her. Then I decided to finally call Tawny....the supposed best friend of mine that hasnt seemed to give a rats ass that I got raped by her boyfriend's best friend a few weeks ago. Tawny has been telling me to call her, leaving me messages on myspace telling me she misses me.

But of course, she dosent fucking pick up. Tried calling her a 2nd time.....no answer again. I was finally able to get myself together with what I wanted to say to her after all these weeks and she dosent fuckin answer. FUCKKKKK this bullshit. Seriously, its all fucking bullshit.

I really want to call my boyfriend, but hes at the PSW East coast party at Elvis's right now, and I dont want to ruin his time. I feel let down, un important and un appreciated.....I still cant believe Tawny is being like this....it breaks my fucking heart.....