Alright, so first order of business, I need a new book, recommend me something!
Moving on, I suppose I'll do an actual blog here, I don't ever really talk about what's going on in my life, but looking at recent events I think it might be a good idea.
Relationships:
I was in a casual and open on/off relationship until the end of may, this was with a girl I hooked up with last year and we've sort of been on and off (as in "on" when I was visiting and "off" when I was here in California) it was really more of a sexual/getting high together thing, there was never anything there. Anyway in the middle of this an old ex girlfriend called me out the blue that I never quite got over and led me on for a couple months then effectively dumped me again for a better looking guy... this hurt a little because I did really like her, I posted a few pictures of her on here. Anyway a little while ago she tried to contact me again (I guess I'm her back up guy or something?) and when she did I realized I didn't really care for her anymore, whatever lustful hold she had over me before had faded, which is good because she is a pretty shitty person. She was one of the last things in my past that was bugging me and coming back up and it feels good to have that resolved and out of my present life. I'm free of previous baggage and it feels great. Also I found out recently that this girl I dated in Florida for two years got e. coli about a month after she burned me (emotionally, as well as literally and intentionally with a cigarette) and stole my stuff. While I'm glad she survived, I enjoyed hearing the news!
Life, death and cancer:
A few months ago a friend of mine developed brain tumors and died. There was nothing the doctors could do to save him. I can't imagine what it was like for him to be told he had a month or two to live. Charley will be missed and his death serves as a reminder to me to have some fucking fun in life, to not give a shit what other people think about what I do, and follow my heart. It feels like it is so easy to forget and just slip back into normal everyday bullshit, but I will try not too. I don't want too, I want to be satisfied and happy, I don't want to just be comfortable.
My family and my money:
My family is great, I love them, but they are passive aggressive manipulative asses too. I know what they do is often out of love, albeit selfish love more often to not, so I hold nothing against them. My mother wants me to move back to the town she lives in, this sucks because it is SO easy to do and I definitely don't want to because I get stuck in a rut there and fall back into bad habits easily and usually just become gluttonous and depressed. Money is a constant annoyance, I have more then enough right now for whatever, but I know how easily I can have none at all from experience. I can live happily on very little money, but I have a problem of if I have money I just want to spend it one stuff instead of saving it. So instead of having like 20 or 30 thousand saved right now I have like $8,000, because I buy dumb stuff that I'll throw away when I move anyway, like this big TV, seriously what the hell am I going to do with this when I move? I'll probably mail it to my brother and hope it doesn't break. The one thing I am spending a ton of money on and am not regretting is my sleeve, it's coming along great and I'll sure anyone that cares will see it when it's done.
And this brings us to roughly now:
So... the beautiful Spoiled has been making be grin like an idiot for several days now. I'm damning the distance between California and New York, but that wont matter once she invents that teleporter. Or you know, if I move. Around thanksgiving I'm probably out of California, I'll just have to make a trip down here around new years or something if my sleeve isn't finished yet. My current job looks like it'll be ending rather soon and since they also supply my housing I'm going to have to move, I'm looking at Seattle and New York right now, I'm needing a colder winter after this summer and a big city too, some place where I don't have to own a car for awhile, give me a bicycle and a subway/bus and I'm fine. I am so done with modern cars, their gas millage still sucks and I have a ton of trouble with their computers. I still have my old beater Orange '71 VW Squareback if I decide a really need a car, but it is in Idaho right now... I'll add a bit more later, I need to get back to work.
Moving on, I suppose I'll do an actual blog here, I don't ever really talk about what's going on in my life, but looking at recent events I think it might be a good idea.
Relationships:
I was in a casual and open on/off relationship until the end of may, this was with a girl I hooked up with last year and we've sort of been on and off (as in "on" when I was visiting and "off" when I was here in California) it was really more of a sexual/getting high together thing, there was never anything there. Anyway in the middle of this an old ex girlfriend called me out the blue that I never quite got over and led me on for a couple months then effectively dumped me again for a better looking guy... this hurt a little because I did really like her, I posted a few pictures of her on here. Anyway a little while ago she tried to contact me again (I guess I'm her back up guy or something?) and when she did I realized I didn't really care for her anymore, whatever lustful hold she had over me before had faded, which is good because she is a pretty shitty person. She was one of the last things in my past that was bugging me and coming back up and it feels good to have that resolved and out of my present life. I'm free of previous baggage and it feels great. Also I found out recently that this girl I dated in Florida for two years got e. coli about a month after she burned me (emotionally, as well as literally and intentionally with a cigarette) and stole my stuff. While I'm glad she survived, I enjoyed hearing the news!
Life, death and cancer:
A few months ago a friend of mine developed brain tumors and died. There was nothing the doctors could do to save him. I can't imagine what it was like for him to be told he had a month or two to live. Charley will be missed and his death serves as a reminder to me to have some fucking fun in life, to not give a shit what other people think about what I do, and follow my heart. It feels like it is so easy to forget and just slip back into normal everyday bullshit, but I will try not too. I don't want too, I want to be satisfied and happy, I don't want to just be comfortable.
My family and my money:
My family is great, I love them, but they are passive aggressive manipulative asses too. I know what they do is often out of love, albeit selfish love more often to not, so I hold nothing against them. My mother wants me to move back to the town she lives in, this sucks because it is SO easy to do and I definitely don't want to because I get stuck in a rut there and fall back into bad habits easily and usually just become gluttonous and depressed. Money is a constant annoyance, I have more then enough right now for whatever, but I know how easily I can have none at all from experience. I can live happily on very little money, but I have a problem of if I have money I just want to spend it one stuff instead of saving it. So instead of having like 20 or 30 thousand saved right now I have like $8,000, because I buy dumb stuff that I'll throw away when I move anyway, like this big TV, seriously what the hell am I going to do with this when I move? I'll probably mail it to my brother and hope it doesn't break. The one thing I am spending a ton of money on and am not regretting is my sleeve, it's coming along great and I'll sure anyone that cares will see it when it's done.
And this brings us to roughly now:
So... the beautiful Spoiled has been making be grin like an idiot for several days now. I'm damning the distance between California and New York, but that wont matter once she invents that teleporter. Or you know, if I move. Around thanksgiving I'm probably out of California, I'll just have to make a trip down here around new years or something if my sleeve isn't finished yet. My current job looks like it'll be ending rather soon and since they also supply my housing I'm going to have to move, I'm looking at Seattle and New York right now, I'm needing a colder winter after this summer and a big city too, some place where I don't have to own a car for awhile, give me a bicycle and a subway/bus and I'm fine. I am so done with modern cars, their gas millage still sucks and I have a ton of trouble with their computers. I still have my old beater Orange '71 VW Squareback if I decide a really need a car, but it is in Idaho right now... I'll add a bit more later, I need to get back to work.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
user081222227:
..hell yeah you get to watch.. then you can wrap me up in cellophane and take me home so i can bleed and goo all over your sheets
user081222227: