Sometimes I get discouraged when I think about life: my life, your life, the life of the guy sitting across from on the train. I get to thinking that it's all heading in the same direction--- we fight so hard to be different, to make a difference, and yet, at the end of the day, we're all lying in bed feeling the same. Sometimes I feel like no matter what I do, I'll never be doing what I should, what I'm meant to--- and that scares the shit out of me.
I just want to wake up in the morning with a clear head--- with some goal in mind--- with some way to acheive the things I dream about.
I'd love to get a camera--- a real one--- and go around the city and capture what beauty is left--- and maybe some of the ugliness, as well.
Once I develop the pictures, the moments I've stolen [frozen], I'll paste words over the faces, in the clouds, in the rain collecting in the gutters. I'll sell ironic postcards for 50 cents and maybe one day, someone will mail me one.
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In other news [I'll take a break from my strange mood], I'm really getting into religious studies. Since I grew up very religious and have since broken away from organized religion, I'm fascinated by those who stay in it. I want to know why and how and all the intimate details. I've started to research the Gnostic Gospels and the stuff I've found is so interesting. I'd love to interview some religious women to add onto the project I did for my final in my Women's Spirituality class. It's kind of refreshing to be motivated again. I haven't felt that lately...
I just want to wake up in the morning with a clear head--- with some goal in mind--- with some way to acheive the things I dream about.
I'd love to get a camera--- a real one--- and go around the city and capture what beauty is left--- and maybe some of the ugliness, as well.
Once I develop the pictures, the moments I've stolen [frozen], I'll paste words over the faces, in the clouds, in the rain collecting in the gutters. I'll sell ironic postcards for 50 cents and maybe one day, someone will mail me one.
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In other news [I'll take a break from my strange mood], I'm really getting into religious studies. Since I grew up very religious and have since broken away from organized religion, I'm fascinated by those who stay in it. I want to know why and how and all the intimate details. I've started to research the Gnostic Gospels and the stuff I've found is so interesting. I'd love to interview some religious women to add onto the project I did for my final in my Women's Spirituality class. It's kind of refreshing to be motivated again. I haven't felt that lately...
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Ooo, are you gonna end up in the religious studies program like me? 'Cause that would be crazy-awesome. There's a couple projects that I've been wanting to work on this summer in the vein of the one we did in Katherine's class. We'll have to discuss it in between debaucherous moments today.
i kinda miss you.