So, I got absolutely crushed last night. The woman I had been seeing (J), was the most amazing woman I had ever met. If I had written a list of all the qualities, interests, and attributes that I was looking for in a partner, she was it and then some. I felt connected to her like I never had felt with anyone, ever in my life. She understood me on a level that I didn't think was possible. I had, quite possibly, the most horrible childhood imaginable. Think of all of the most horrifying things that you could imagine happening to a child, then you're in the neighborhood. She had a similar experience, so we shared this common ground, we also shared and profound understanding of each other that no one else has ever been able to get, for either of us. I was completely falling in love with her as she was with me.
Because of a complex divorce and custody arraignment with my exwife (T), there was some interaction between T and J specifically in regards to my son, what the "rules" were and what T's expectations were for J and my son's interaction were to be. Unfortunately, T used that meeting to bash me, hyper inflate all my flaws, and air all our dirty laundry from our marriage. Once I found this out, I set very strong and obvious groundrules for T. One of which was for her to not contact J. I should have done it sooner, however, T's hyperintellegent and highly educated so I just assumed she knew the difference between right and wrong. You know what they say about assuming.....
Over the last 2 weeks I've noticed that J was pulling away. I chose not to pressure her into communicating with me. I just felt that she need some space and time to figure things out. Last night, T emailed J to "check in" to make sure that both myself and J were abiding by my divorce agreement. For J, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. She emailed me that she could not continue. It was a very long email covering many points, everyone of which was completely valid. She has every reason in the world to walk away, and on no level, can I fault her for it.
She did say in the email that she still has hope for us and it might just be that the timing is off. She also said that she wants to get together and talk because she doesn't know what to do at this point.
When I was with J, I was sleeping like a baby. Needless to say, my insomnia was back, full force last night. At this point, as I write this, I have been awake for 28 hours.
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Because of a complex divorce and custody arraignment with my exwife (T), there was some interaction between T and J specifically in regards to my son, what the "rules" were and what T's expectations were for J and my son's interaction were to be. Unfortunately, T used that meeting to bash me, hyper inflate all my flaws, and air all our dirty laundry from our marriage. Once I found this out, I set very strong and obvious groundrules for T. One of which was for her to not contact J. I should have done it sooner, however, T's hyperintellegent and highly educated so I just assumed she knew the difference between right and wrong. You know what they say about assuming.....
Over the last 2 weeks I've noticed that J was pulling away. I chose not to pressure her into communicating with me. I just felt that she need some space and time to figure things out. Last night, T emailed J to "check in" to make sure that both myself and J were abiding by my divorce agreement. For J, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. She emailed me that she could not continue. It was a very long email covering many points, everyone of which was completely valid. She has every reason in the world to walk away, and on no level, can I fault her for it.
She did say in the email that she still has hope for us and it might just be that the timing is off. She also said that she wants to get together and talk because she doesn't know what to do at this point.
When I was with J, I was sleeping like a baby. Needless to say, my insomnia was back, full force last night. At this point, as I write this, I have been awake for 28 hours.
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