...to stop feeling good about things.
How do I start this shit? Lets start with the car accident.
Car in the right lane swerved into the right turn lane, cutting off my route of escape. So I couldn't speed up without hitting them, but at least I was out of the path of the guy in the left lane. Well, he decided to sharply change lanes in an intersection while speeding and running a red light (breaking 3 laws in the process). The angle he hit me, the force his car (weighing 500lbs less than mine) hit me with to send me as far as I was thrown, and the fact his car spun in a circle are all evidence of the angle of his wheels and rate of speed. Two obviously totaled cars.
My 2015 Crosstrek
Fuckstick's 2001 Corolla
I get out of the car and fall over. Can't even stand. The buckle of my seat belt hit my hip with so much force, my hip just quit working. No airbag touched my body, but I was still pushed out from underneath my glasses. My sunglasses, kept in the center cup holder, flew out the crack between the frame of my car and door that was bent before the curtain airbag on the side of impact had a chance to inflate and block them from exiting the car. If I had a passenger, they would absolutely have been killed. These are all important details. Oh yeah, it took over ten minutes for a cop to show up. Not two minutes after the state cop pulled into Love's in an Explorer did this accident happen. No Explorer was at the scene, just a Taurus. Do a bit of reading on the morality and corruption of the PA state police. You may be shocked by what you see.
So I'm taken to the hospital to see how fucked my hip is. While in the ER, cop delivered my copy of the accident report stating the driver who hit me was cited. Great, my insurance company will appreciate this. The following week, I get a call from fuckstick's insurance company saying they're not paying. "Excuse me? You don't GET to call me, I'm not your fucking client. You have shit to say to me, I'll hear I through MY insurance company. Who I'm calling right after I hang up on you, because they're gonna want to know Geico wants to fight." Called them, they already heard from Geico.
Couple hours later I get a call from the state cop who cited the other driver. Changes his mind, he's citing me instead. Fuck you, dickhead. What happened is pretty goddamn obvious, even without cameras at the intersection. There were many witnesses to speak with as well.
So I already know I'm fighting this. I'm looking up traffic laws, I'm pulling up Google Earth images of the intersection, I'm marking where vehicles were, direction of travel, measuring distances and even do time studies after work. Yellow light duration of 4.5 seconds in a 45mph zone. Consistent with the recommendations of the traffic engineer outfit the state deals with. Time it takes to get to the "stop here" line of the intersection at a steady speed of 45mph: 4.68 seconds. Human reaction time based on most recent scientific study, visual stimulus for men: .3 seconds. My case is rock solid. I'm looking forward to embarrassing this cop.
Hearing comes around, I'm half an hour early. Cop and his partner show up two minutes before the hearing. Surprised they even showed. Not as surprised as he seemed by my file of research and photos of the accident (a witness kindly offered to take photos since I couldn't walk). He starts, judge shuts him down with "that driver isn't present, that's heresay". He gets flustered. Starts again. "That witness isn't present. That's heresay". He gives up and starts parroting vehicle code. Fantastic. He quits, and I haven't even testified yet.
I present everything. Judge tries to say "speculation". No fucker, it's right here in black and white satellite imagery and full-color photos on my phone showing area and angle of impact, and where our vehicles came to rest. And don't tell me what I know damn well I saw with my own two eyes is "speculation".
Asks for a rebuttal from the state cop. Parrots the same line of vehicle code. Judgement against me. Why?
Because in the event of an accident, the vehicle making a left turn is automatically at fault. Inarguably, 100% of the time, no matter how many laws the striking vehicle broke. By judge's logic, I can't make a left turn. Anywhere at any time. Because if someone wants a new vehicle, all they have to do is hit me and I'm fucked.
Appeal? Not without an attorney. The process is so goddamn convoluted and instructions so unclear, it requires a lawyer to get shit sorted within 30 days.
THE TROLL
I'd noticed a series of alt Twitch accounts annoying people and sexually harassing female streamers in my circle of friends. I never much trusted this guy, so I was easy for me to connect dots nobody else thought to. In total, he's had no less than six accounts he's been using to harass female streamers with no active mods, while using his primary account to scold these people because he isn't a moderator and can't ban the person. He gets mod status, warns the troll account one last time, doesn't ban them, but that account is never seen in that channel again. He likes to play the White Knight role, but has to create his own drama to do so. It's pathetic. To male streamers, he's a kissass and follows all the bigger streamer's moderators to gain their admiration or something, talks his way into being promoted to moderator, then uses that status to gain more attention in chat, drop subtle hints he's also a streamer, gain more followers and basically sham his way through channel growth.
Well, he got careless. As did I, slightly. I'd banned him and all the alt accounts I knew of from my channel with the intent of not streaming until after I'd presented my findings to the matriarch of our clan. Really awkward to see someone who may still consider me a friend in my list of viewers, knowing they're banned from chat and knowing this person knows where they stand with me. So he was shitting bricks for a few days until he was confronted and booted from the clan. He's since created his own and has been poaching the less loyal of us from our clan. His betrayal has caused a lot of division among the community and discouraged several from streaming anymore.
THE LAST STRIKE
Won't go into detail on this one because I'm actually pretty embarrassed about it, but a situation I unintentionally caused could possibly lead to a lawsuit against my employer. So I got yanked into the CEO's office, told about myself, and informed that I'm on probation and this is the last time I'm leaving his office as an employee. Fuck. Well, at least I had a date that night.
THE GIRL
Obviously, right? There's always a girl, and never in a good way.
Started talking early this month on a dating site I should just delete my profile from. As soon as she learned I was military, she promoted me to communicating on Snapchat. She seemed really into me. Like, REALLY into me. If I took too long to respond to something after opening it, she'd send a cute photo telling me to keep talking and not ignore her. When I'd type something, she's already got our conversation open before I send what I'm typing. And I was really into her as well. To me, she symbolized the shit the last couple months have been coming to an end and a brighter future including this adorable blonde ten years younger than me, but more mature that most her age. She's an accountant, for fucks sake.
The day before our date, I proposed breakfast on Sunday. She already had plans for a spa weekend with two of her friends. Okay, dinner tomorrow then. "When and where? Text me the address." Holy shit, this is actually happening. And SHE'S the one calling this a date. And she's just as excited as I'm trying to hide.
At Applebee's, I thought dinner was great. Seemed she had a good time too. I told her to let me know when she got home so I know she didn't hit a deer (jaywalking fucktards are a serious problem). She let me know she was home, and that was the last text I got from her. Figured she was doing laundry and packing Friday, since her Thursday evening was spent with me. Exchanged a couple messages on Snapchat and told her I'd leave her to her friends for the weekend and I'll talk to her when she gets home Sunday.
Sunday evening, I told her I sense a lack of interest. Well, something I said or did during dinner reminded her of an ex things didn't end well with, and she can't get over that. Couple hours after that, I send her a long text basically telling her that I think she's worth pursuing and I'll show her that there's far more to me than that thing she never even specified she wasn't okay with.
Couple days later, I sent a long Chat. I wanted to see if it was read and ignored or just never opened. I'd put a lot of thought into it. I reminded her of our undeniable chemistry and how little sense it makes to let one thing during dinner overshadow everything else. She opened it a couple minutes later, saved it, and said she'll reply during her lunch. What a relief, there's still hope.
No there wasn't. Messages seemed promising at first. I really thought I'd be able to convince her to give me a second chance at a first date. She crushed me. Afterwards, we're not even friends on Snapchat anymore. I've been miserable all week. I've been spending breaks at work in the car so I can avoid people. I haven't been eating. I shut down on Twitter, Twitch and Discord. On PS4, I'm invisible. I haven't been this upset about someone in many years. The worst thing is that I know I'll never forget her. She'll be hurting me for many years to come.