Wow, i have rarely been this pissed in my life. I feel stupid and naive. I feel so alone. i dont have anyone to rely on. My mom should be there for me. She promised she would help me if i moved closer to her. I did that, she didn't help any more. She said if i had to take evening shifts, she would help me. I declined the offer because i manage to get my shift on the week ends when my girls are at their father. She promised she would babysit once and a while, not too often, so that i can have a minimum of a life.I work days during the week, night on the week end, i feel like an ermit. I work 50 hours weeks. I am a single mom. I'm so tired. It's my birthday on monday, i asked her today to be there for me, on my day. She knows i'm having a hard time lately, that i'm trying to fight the depression as hard as i can. I haven't ask her anything thing, not once, in the last 10 months. She told me i was being selfish. How could i dare ask her to sit on a monday night. She told me that she hated to have to stay in for me when i was a kid, she was not going to do it all over again, now that's she's not obliged to. That she was tired, that I decided to have kids, even if she was against the idea. She went nuts. All that in like 2 minutes. I hung up. I'm not event sure i said bye. I'm so sad. I hope, i wish so hard to be the exact opposit of her as a mom. As far from her attitude as i can. Je suis vraiment due.
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I hope you get to smile on your birthday.