so here I am again after a night of drinking at the sorority house.
also known as me not getting drunk and then solving all the house drama, and hating boys while I'm at it. What is it about me? I'm really beginning to hate boys. They're worthless, pointless, and just hurt you. Perhaps I'm bitter? Perhaps I'm cynical? But yeah, I am. I'm that girl. The bitter scary one. The 5'10" Amazon with a hatred of men. I'm probably a damn good example of the ample female body: the boobs, the hips, the curvy waist, the long blonde hair, the pale blue eyes... but I'm the Amazon as well. I'm big, intimidating. I'm the scary one that guys look at while at parties going, "Damn.. she's cute, but she could break me in half." Then they move onto shorter girls, smaller girls. The ones who giggle and get drunk. I'm the one who keeps my cool and keeps an eye on every girl I came with. Why? So if I have to beat the guys off with a stick or send them home, I can. I just stay silent, I withdraw, I watch as my girls flirt and giggle and get any guy they want, while I stay in the shadows and make sure they're ok. Why do I get ignored? Because that's what I do. I hide; I intimidate; I brood. I watch as the girls stumble and help pick them back up. Insert a few sarcastically cynical or overtly sexual comments and you've got me. I dress to impress, but I don't join the pack of wolves that are the single girls that I hang out with. They see the guys they want, and jump on them, fight for them, and view it as a contest. It always is a contest, but I don't jump; I don't fight. I'm the one who would rather wish that someone would walk over to her and just start talking, about music, art, theatre, history, anything... Even if it is just a discussion on past drinking and drink preferences. I want to be approached. Sadly, I force myself to be not approachable. I make sure that I am that: secluded, dark, hidden. And I'm good at it-- very good. If I went out and pressed my breasts up against a guy and whispered slightly slurred sexual obscurities at him, I would probably get a guy just as easily as they, but I don't want that to be the reason that I get one. I'm not the girl to do that. At least I don't want to be. I think I'm going to officially take myself off the market. Either that, or just continue my wait for "him" to come to me. Well, either way, I will make no concise effort to find one. I'm ready to be done with all that. I was done with it a while ago. Tonight I've realised it. I'll just be that good friend who's mostly sober, and ready to deal with the situation when one of my friends' honour needs defending
I'll be the Amazon.
Maybe one day I'll find a guy who will honestly and truly appreciate it.
also known as me not getting drunk and then solving all the house drama, and hating boys while I'm at it. What is it about me? I'm really beginning to hate boys. They're worthless, pointless, and just hurt you. Perhaps I'm bitter? Perhaps I'm cynical? But yeah, I am. I'm that girl. The bitter scary one. The 5'10" Amazon with a hatred of men. I'm probably a damn good example of the ample female body: the boobs, the hips, the curvy waist, the long blonde hair, the pale blue eyes... but I'm the Amazon as well. I'm big, intimidating. I'm the scary one that guys look at while at parties going, "Damn.. she's cute, but she could break me in half." Then they move onto shorter girls, smaller girls. The ones who giggle and get drunk. I'm the one who keeps my cool and keeps an eye on every girl I came with. Why? So if I have to beat the guys off with a stick or send them home, I can. I just stay silent, I withdraw, I watch as my girls flirt and giggle and get any guy they want, while I stay in the shadows and make sure they're ok. Why do I get ignored? Because that's what I do. I hide; I intimidate; I brood. I watch as the girls stumble and help pick them back up. Insert a few sarcastically cynical or overtly sexual comments and you've got me. I dress to impress, but I don't join the pack of wolves that are the single girls that I hang out with. They see the guys they want, and jump on them, fight for them, and view it as a contest. It always is a contest, but I don't jump; I don't fight. I'm the one who would rather wish that someone would walk over to her and just start talking, about music, art, theatre, history, anything... Even if it is just a discussion on past drinking and drink preferences. I want to be approached. Sadly, I force myself to be not approachable. I make sure that I am that: secluded, dark, hidden. And I'm good at it-- very good. If I went out and pressed my breasts up against a guy and whispered slightly slurred sexual obscurities at him, I would probably get a guy just as easily as they, but I don't want that to be the reason that I get one. I'm not the girl to do that. At least I don't want to be. I think I'm going to officially take myself off the market. Either that, or just continue my wait for "him" to come to me. Well, either way, I will make no concise effort to find one. I'm ready to be done with all that. I was done with it a while ago. Tonight I've realised it. I'll just be that good friend who's mostly sober, and ready to deal with the situation when one of my friends' honour needs defending
I'll be the Amazon.
Maybe one day I'll find a guy who will honestly and truly appreciate it.
Hello