"You see things, you understand them, your a wallflower" i absolutely love the book the perks of being a wallflower and finally got to see the movie the other day I've always thought of myself to be a lot like charlie.

Ive been "unemployed" since December, I get laid off every winter and this its been a long one. so since I have no life and virtually no friends cause I'm so antisocial I'm pretty much going insane. Its pretty bad when you are so antisocial you can't even bring yourself to blog on a site like this. From what i have seen on the site there are some really cool poeple who dont judge others and are very welcoming. I know there are a lot of people like me on here. That go through the same stuff, and yet I'm still scared of trying to make connections. Seems to be I'm always let down when I try in the real world.

I started at a mma the other day. I did Kempo and kick boxing from age 4-18 since then I've been pretty lazy so the muay Thai classes have been kicking my ass. Maybe its the growing up with it but there's something about punching and getting punched that feels right, I just wish I was a little better at interacting with all the people there. They all seem really cool and accepting, it just takes me awhile to open up and get use to people.

If anyone actually reads this I'm sorry its kinda a ramble on nonsensical mumble, like I said even virtual social interaction kinda scares me. I'm hoping to get better at this.