This is your hero, Remy Suicide, checking in from behind enemy lines.
-Over the weekend, my transport finally gave up the ghost. The transmission died in my car over three miles from home. So I called my dad to come pick me up and bring his AAA card, but he was too busy...getting his hair colored! So I walk home in the cold and call five different tow services before a guy who will be able to tow me home. He tows me home and then I go in to get my dad to pay him (something he would have been able to avoid if he'd just given me his AAA card.) and my dad is still too busy getting his hair lowlighted by the Whore of Babylon. He says he'll be out in a little bit. Unable to believe it, I manage to get him to write a check which I take out to the guy. Luckily, the tow guy was nice and didn't ask too many questions. I'd hate to have had to explain that my dad couldn't come out and pay him because he was getting his hair colored like some high school girl.
-There were sammiches. And a fight about them. Sunday afternoon. The kitchen. I made 5 sandwiches. I'm a hungry boy with a high metabolism. Dawhora can't resist making a crack about how I'm a pig. I say "Thank you." This approach of not getting mad really pisses her off. So she starts extolling my piggish virtues at length, in her foul, gutter vernacular. Finally I tell her Enough. She gets right in my face and glares up into my eyes, continuing with her gutter mouth telling me that if she wants my shit, she'll unscrew my head and dip her hand in it. I froze, my entire body trembling with tension at restraining the urge to slap the skank right off of her. Instead I did the next best thing, I returned that even glare and she turned it into a staredown. It was like that for about thirty seconds before my lips curled into a malicious smile and I let just a little of that rage slip into my eyes. She freaked and started yelling for my dad to come up and take care of the situation, breaking eye contact immediately and taking a couple of steps back. Three words and some eye contact were all it took to cow that Beast.
Peace out
Remy
-Over the weekend, my transport finally gave up the ghost. The transmission died in my car over three miles from home. So I called my dad to come pick me up and bring his AAA card, but he was too busy...getting his hair colored! So I walk home in the cold and call five different tow services before a guy who will be able to tow me home. He tows me home and then I go in to get my dad to pay him (something he would have been able to avoid if he'd just given me his AAA card.) and my dad is still too busy getting his hair lowlighted by the Whore of Babylon. He says he'll be out in a little bit. Unable to believe it, I manage to get him to write a check which I take out to the guy. Luckily, the tow guy was nice and didn't ask too many questions. I'd hate to have had to explain that my dad couldn't come out and pay him because he was getting his hair colored like some high school girl.
-There were sammiches. And a fight about them. Sunday afternoon. The kitchen. I made 5 sandwiches. I'm a hungry boy with a high metabolism. Dawhora can't resist making a crack about how I'm a pig. I say "Thank you." This approach of not getting mad really pisses her off. So she starts extolling my piggish virtues at length, in her foul, gutter vernacular. Finally I tell her Enough. She gets right in my face and glares up into my eyes, continuing with her gutter mouth telling me that if she wants my shit, she'll unscrew my head and dip her hand in it. I froze, my entire body trembling with tension at restraining the urge to slap the skank right off of her. Instead I did the next best thing, I returned that even glare and she turned it into a staredown. It was like that for about thirty seconds before my lips curled into a malicious smile and I let just a little of that rage slip into my eyes. She freaked and started yelling for my dad to come up and take care of the situation, breaking eye contact immediately and taking a couple of steps back. Three words and some eye contact were all it took to cow that Beast.
Peace out
Remy
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
wibbledish:
Good job on the staredown! And hello 
drave:
I thinks my transmission is on its way out.. oh god..