regnak

k i know im kinda of a downer on my posts but, this is where i let stuff out i dont want friends and family to read. dont really feel like putting up with questions. so yes i do hide here a lil bit. sue me

anyway, ive been really depressed lately, mostly cause im tired of life messing with me. i make friend easier with women then men, i seem to gather female freinds pretty easily but really only have one guy i call true friend. anyway what been getting to me lately is that i keep on meeting people(usually women), getting to know them then they have a big like issue arise. so me being me i try to help as much as i can. and the person REALLY appreciates it. then we just seem to go our seperate ways. then i meet the next person and the same process continues. for 15 years this has been going on. now i dont mind helping people that need it. but i want some fucking stability in my life and it doesnt feel like thats gonna happen with a round robin of people coming and going all the time

and it doesnt really help that i usually REALlY start liking the person. and thats my problem and i know it

now this doesnt mean i want to stop talking to those of u i am talking to at the moment. just wanted to get this out of my head. also i know this might not make sense but ive never been good at getting things out of my head and down on paper or screen concisely